‘You…you snake. You fucking viper,’ I whisper. ‘You…’
I remember the days after Morgan and Jak disappeared… How he found me wandering.
‘You brought me back to this room that night. You…’ I flinch at the memory of him fucking me in that very bed while I begged it of him in my haze of need… ‘and then in the morning, you did something to me.’
‘A conjure. I took your memory of us, Bryn.’
‘And you took me…’ My traitorous lip quivers, ‘to that place instead of the Light like you promised. Gods, you made me believe… You made me hope and then you robbed me of it, you took me frommyselfand then you brought me to that place…the pits…’
My fists clench.
‘I killed in that place.’ I close my eyes. ‘I didn’t even care. Was that you as well? Did you…make me like that? An animal who fought others for scraps, who murdered for them without remorse?’
‘Yes.’ He says it so matter-of-factly, not even sounding the least bit sorry. ‘A secondary conjure.’
My eyes clench tightly and my stomach twists. ‘Why?’
‘I…made your need to survive surpass all else in your mind. To ensure you lived long enough.’
‘For what? So, you could get your information?’ I whisper.
‘Yes.’ He pauses. ‘And because…I was never intending to leave you there, Bryn. You must believe me. It was going to be a matter of hours, days at most, and then we were both going to escape back to Merediea and then to the Light. But, when we arrived?—’
‘Warrior was there,’ I mutter, remembering his nasty smile, the dark goatee, and those jeweled knives of his.
‘What?’ Morgan snarls.
‘I’ll tell you the full tale once we get home,’ Locke tells Morgan before looking back at me. ‘But yes. He was there. He told Bere I was a traitor. I was set upon by five orcs and then iron bound. For many weeks while Bere and Warrior made me pay in all the ways they could think of for my treachery. Until yesterday when you freed me.’
‘But Morgan said it was but a sennight,’ I whisper, searching his face.
He closes his eyes. ‘For them it was, but time passes more quickly there. For you…and for me…it was much longer, Bryn. Likely closer to eight or nine weeks. I was…in and out of consciousness, so I can’t be certain of how many it truly was for us.’
‘Do you wish for me to feel sorry for you,’ I ask, ‘by telling me what you endured?’
‘No, Bryn. I just… I want you to… You mustn’t blame yourself for the things you did there.’
‘I don’t!’ I snarl. ‘I blame you!’
It’s a lie but at least he winces, just a bit.
‘And, after all that, did you get the information that you wanted? Was it worth it, Locke?’ I spit.
‘Yes,’ he says, looking into my eyes. ‘I got the information I went there for…in the end.’
‘Well, how lovely for you!’ I snap, feeling like beating him senseless or curling into a ball by the hearth and crying until I can’t anymore.
I’m not sure which.
Instead, I turn from him, pulling away from Morgan with a snarl when he tries to embrace me.
‘You left me!’ I hiss at him and ignore the devastation I see in his eyes. ‘You deserted me after promising me that you would make sure I got to the Light.’
‘Bryn,’ he begins just as Locke says something I don’t hear.
‘No!’ I half shout at them both. ‘I’ve heard enough lies from honeyed fae lips to last a lifetime. No more.’
I go to the corner and slide down the wall, curling in on myself and not looking at either of them.
