"Where are you?"
No answer.
There was never an answer.
I pushed myself to my feet and walked toward the stairs, and I didn't look back at the body in the chair, because looking back meant counting, and counting meant facing the number, and the number was a wound I couldn't close.
"Daddy."
The prayer followed me up the stairs, into the morning, into the city that didn't care whether I lived or died.
"Where are you?"
"I'm still here."
"I'm still waiting."
"I'm still yours."
"Please."
"Please come home."
5
The Shadow at 4 AM
Iwas dreaming about the collar again.
The metal was warm against my throat, the way it always had been—not tight, not uncomfortable, just present. A weight I'd stopped noticing until it was gone. In the dream, I was standing in front of the mirror in the pink room, and Gabriel was behind me, his hands on my shoulders, his reflection watching mine.
"You're the only one."
His voice was soft. Certain. The kind of certain that made me want to believe him, even when I knew better.
"The only one who mattered. The only one I kept."
"What about the others?"
I didn't remember asking the question. In the dream, my mouth moved without my permission, forming words I hadn't chosen.
"What others?"
"The other Bunnies. The ones before me."
His reflection smiled. It was the kind smile, the one that made my chest ache. Not the cold one. Not the one that came before punishments.
"There were no others. There was only ever you."
I wanted to believe him. In the dream, I did believe him. I leaned back against his chest and felt his arms wrap around me, and I was warm, and I was safe, and I was loved.
"You're my perfect girl."
"Your only girl."
"My only."
The dream shifted.
