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“I’ll be back soon,” he says, heading for the door.
There’s an “I love you” trapped in my throat, but I don’t let it out, even if it’s true.
I’m determined now.
I won’t say it first, even if the only Wardhole I’m worried about now is the Ward-hole he’s left in my heart.
24
On A Roll (Ward)
I pour two fingers of scotch and sit at the desk in my study.
Life has gone to shit pretty well the last few days. My parents have always been demons, but until now their drama was confined to the family and anyone else unlucky enough to get sucked up in their orbit.
Don’t get me wrong. What they let happen to Dylan Parnell was atrocious, but even the kid actor made a choice to stumble into their dealings.
Paige didn’t. She’s completely innocent, and the thing that keeps me up with bleary eyes and a mighty headache is the fact that it’s me.
I’m the selfish prick who dragged this sweet woman into the muck. And all to run an engagement con job on an eccentric British deca-billionaire.
Am I my father’s son after all?
I’ll never forget the gleam of fear in her eyes when I rammed my fist into my desk after talking to Winthrope. I’m the one who put it there, and I’m the heel who’s making her sick as a dog with worry over my dumbass.
Her words earlier this week about how I care for people, how I’m no beast, loop through my head. So does the horrific truth that she’s falling too hard, too deep, and it’s proven by her urge to help.
I take a burning sip of scotch.
No, I can’t let Paige get wrecked. My baggage will smash her to bits like the funny, achingly beautiful, and creative butterfly woman she is.
She can’t come out of this fuckery as jaded as Nick and me.
Everyone thinks my little brother is a joker playboy, and he is. But Nick dives into his pursuits for good reason.
It’s a hell of a lot easier than thinking too much, carrying the cross-sized chip on my shoulder. Nick keeps women at a distance so he doesn’t have to get close to anyone. It makes sense.
If he doesn’t, he can’t damage them.
With Paige, I have to do better.
I have to throw her back from the brink before she steps into a raging fire.
The door to my study creaks opens.
My doting bride-to-never-be stands in the doorway with a silver tray of food she must’ve swiped from Grayson. “Hi. I made you dinner.”
I’m up like a shot with a muttered ,“thanks,” wondering why my throat feels so raw.
She moves to my desk and sets the tray down with a crooked grin.
Then I’m beyond any help. I hold her like a wrecked man clinging to a rock, lost in a bellowing sea.
Fuck, I shouldn’t do this.
If I’m going to protect her, I’ve got to quit encouraging this, feeding these...feelings.
She stretches up on her toes and brushes her lips against my cheek with a soft sigh that ignites my blood.
“Don’t keep the vampire work schedule, okay?” she whispers.
“No promises. I’m part Dracula.” I wrap her tighter, finding her lips with my own. “Vampires are still sexy, right?”
“Um, not the Count kind,” she throws back with a laugh. “I mean it about working yourself to death, Ward.”
Awesome. Not even truly engaged and I’ve got myself a beautifully bossy one.
How do I quit encouraging this? With the way her blouse dips into her cleavage, I want to tear off her top right here. “The sooner I finish, the faster I’ll join you.”
“Hope I didn’t disturb you,” she says with a wink.
I don’t know what it is about her words, but they make me want her more.
I bend down and crush my mouth to hers.
She matches my urgency with a heat that drops through me like a spinning bomb.
We kiss like it might be the last time, and that scares me.
Still, if I’m strong enough to protect her like I should, the end was always coming.
“Paige, you never disturb me. You’re a distraction,” I tell her, pulling away.
She grins gloriously. “Is that a good thing or a bad thing?”
“Haven’t figured that out yet.” It’s more honest than I mean to be.
Her face falls, and I regret my words.
I quickly clasp her chin between my thumb and forefinger.
“Give me a few hours. I’ll be done here.” I kiss her on the forehead again, wishing like hell my lips never had to leave her flesh.
“See you soon, Warden.” And with a smile flung back over the switch of her hips, she’s out the door.
Gulping down the rest of my drink, I slump back into my chair, picking at the food.
The seared buttery steak with herbs and garlic mashed potatoes she’s thrown together revives my dead appetite.
I’m shoveling it in like a horse when three bangs come from the front of the house, followed by a pause, and then two more. The alarm system blips as the door opens.
