“Careful now, little crow.” His words are a warning, yet I hear what I want to hear and take them as encouragement to go further, dipping my hands between my thighs.
“Fuck,” is all Loxen says and runs his fingers through his dishevelled hair. He turns his back to me, still as a statue, as if fighting a battle in his own mind on whether he should walk out the door and leave me be or turn around and fall into the madness I’m presenting to him. He exhales a breath and hangs his head low as defeat takes hold of his morality, and slowly turns back towards me. He creeps forward, kneeling next to the bed. I keep my eyes locked onto his face while rolling two lazy fingers over my clit.
“Please stay,” I beg under my breath, and I watch his Adam’s apple bob on a harsh swallow. A shiver skitters downthe length of my body when I become all too aware of his close proximity. I struggle to think of something defiant to say, my dominance wavering under his stare. The way his eyes roam over my breasts has fire licking at my core. I feel alive under his gaze, and the ache between my thighs has me on the verge of begging—for him to touch me, for him to kiss me, for him to bring me to release. His eyes cloud over with arousal, and it fuels me.
“Keep touching yourself, show me what you would do if I weren’t here right now.” He gives in to his reluctance, and a smile of victory claims my mouth.
I take two fingers into my mouth, swirling my tongue, coating them with my saliva. He watches my every move, never looking away. I trail my fingers down the centre of my body, between my breasts, ever so slowly, pausing to pinch and tease my nipples. A small whimper escapes me from the pleasure the sweet sting brings. Loxen’s brows knit together.
“Now, we can do better than that, can’t we?” His smile returns as I continue to drag my fingers down, reaching my most sensitive flesh. My eyes burn into his face as I watch his tongue swipe over his lower lip, a lip I would love nothing more than to bite—hard. I shouldn’t be enjoying this. This man frustrates me every time we have a simple conversation. And Reed, what about Reed? A scowl takes over my expression, and my conflicting feelings in the moment are making my head spin more than the alcohol I consumed. The sound of Loxen’s laughter fills the room, and I’m snapped back in the moment from the melodic sound that has graced my ears. I glare at him, which only increases his laughter.
“Don’t look at me with such hateful eyes, little crow. It’s evident you’d love nothing more than for me to slip my fingers inside of your panties.” He flashes me a wicked smile, continuing to bait me.
“Spread your legs wider, love. Show me how wet you are forme.” I do as I’m told, dipping two fingers inside my needy pussy, coating them with my arousal.
He watches me intently, his lips parting at the sight of my bare flesh. Loxen towers over me, and I catch a glimpse of his hard length straining against the zipper of his jeans. He moves to the end of my bed, drinking me in, as I lean back against the headboard. “Fuck, you’re so beautiful.” His voice is raspy and breathless, and when I dip my fingers into my dripping centre, he releases an approving groan.
Loxen watches me like he’s burning this moment into his memory, like even if the room caught on fire, he wouldn’t dare peel his eyes away from my flesh. Tracing circles around my clit, I continue to plunge my fingers deep inside myself, imagining they’re his, making me cry out in pleasure. My clit rubs against the palm of my hand, and I release a small whimper. I look at Loxen, gauging his reaction. He bites his lower lip, and I struggle not to reach over and grab it between my teeth.
“Does that feel nice, little crow?” I nod my head, pushing against the swelling nub a little harder. I alternate between rubbing my tender bud and plunging my fingers in and out of my pussy while we stare at one another, the intensity of the moment like nothing I’ve ever felt before.
“Do you picture my face when you touch yourself at night, whimpering my name into the shadows as you bring yourself to ecstasy?”
I moan, unable to form words. He’s edging me, and I don’t know how much more I can take.
“Oh God, Lox,” I cry out in pleasure, the sensation building so rapidly, I’m about to lose control.
“That’s it, say my name, Verena. I want to hear it come from your pretty lips while you come undone for me.”
The room is spinning, and I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to come down from this high.
“Loxen, please…touch me! I need you…”
“Are you begging me, little crow?” A sinful smirk spreads across his lips, but he makes no movements to come any closer.
“Lox, I’m going to—” My orgasm tears through me, breaking down my walls and sending a sensation so intense throughout my entire body. I close my eyes, riding out the euphoric wave that washes over me as I listen to Loxen’s words bring me through to the end.
“You’re beautiful, Verena, insatiable and fucking beautiful.”
My breathing is laboured as I lie in bed, trying to steady myself after sending my body so far over the edge. I open my eyes, immediately looking for Loxen, but he’s nowhere in the room. Sitting up abruptly, I take in my surroundings and see that I’m entirely alone. I didn’t even hear him leave. Why did he sneak away? I try to work out my feelings in the moment, but fail to do much of anything with exhaustion taking over my body.
My eyelids grow heavy, and I can feel sleep pulling me under. I think of Loxen, and the way he looked at me tonight, holding onto the image in my mind as I let myself drift off into deep slumber.
FOURTEEN
VERENA GRAVENHURST
Flecks of light dance along the window’s ledge. Soft rays of sun begin to peek through the cracks of my heavy velour curtains, and I groan, pulling the covers over my head, unwilling to accept that it’s already morning. I want to hide away from the world. Bury my body so deep within these sheets that I become nothing but a strangled corpse, a memory of the girl I used to be. Would anyone even miss me? Memories of last night flood my mind, and I’m forced to relive the moments of coming down from my intoxicating high, only to realize that I’d been abandoned. A feeling you would think I have gotten used to after all of these years. But with Loxen, the feeling of loneliness that I was left with after such an intimate moment, after I tore down my walls and let him see a glimpse of what I’ve let so few uncover, it stung more than a prick of a rose’s thorn, cutting deep into my palm.Does that feel nice, little crow?I can hear his voice in my head like an echo of ecstasy. Heat rises to my cheeks…and between my thighs once again.
I exhale and poke my head out of the covers. Looking around the room, I find myself drifting off into thoughts of what I could’ve done to make himleave me at such a moment. Did I say something that put him off? Did he lose interest? I could’ve sworn I saw the longing and need in his eyes as he watched me building my own release. A few times, I thought he would touch me; I thought he would drag his fingers down my body and make me feel alive in ways I have yet to feel. But instead, he left me with more questions than I had the first day I met him. Now that I’m sober and to my surprise, only slightly hungover, I want to disappear, to melt away so that I no longer have to face him around the manor, but the more I think about the glimmer in his eyes, and the way his lips slightly parted when a whimper would let loose from my lips, the more I’m certain that there’s a reason he up and left. He wanted me as much as I wanted him. There’s no denying it.
Tossing my covers aside, a dull throb blooms in the back of my eyes, a consequence of drowning my feelings in vodka. My stomach growls with the intensity of a starved animal, and I decide Loxen’s disappearing act is not worth losing another moment of thought over. Until I’ve had a steaming cup of coffee and my breakfast, that is. Grabbing my purple silk robe, I cover myself up and slip on my matching slippers, not caring to make myself look presentable to anyone who may see me. Least of all the man I’m still trying to push out of my thoughts. Cracking open the door, I peek out of the small opening, looking to see if anyone is lingering nearby. I don’t know why I feel the need to sneak around my own home, but at times it feels like there are eyes that linger in these halls, like the walls hold more knowledge and would spill secrets that could tear down kingdoms if they could talk.
When I feel the coast is clear, I silently make my way to the dining area where the kitchen staff has more than likely prepared a feast fit for royalty. I tell them it’s not necessary to make so much food, but they continue to do so, finding comfort in sticking to their routines they have come accustomed to while working for my grandfather for all of these years. Rounding thecorner of the large dining room, I am not at all disappointed by the display of fresh fruits and pastries, which have my mouth salivating at the sight of them. I wipe droplets from my chin with the sleeve of my robe and scan my surroundings, hoping nobody just caught me drooling. My shoulders relax when I see that I am still alone. My body slumps into my usual chair, and I fill my plate high with all of the fixings set in front of me. Shovelling the food down, I treat my hangover with the deliciousness of a thousand calories set before me. My eyes flicker to the doorway every time I hear the slightest sound. It’s impossible to deny that I keep hoping it’ll be Loxen, and I want to kick myself for even feeling something so ludicrous for a man I have no business being attracted to.
My coffee has gone cold while I sit at the table, lost in a haze of thoughts. I stare out the window, hoping to catch a glimpse of Loxen’s dark hair bobbing about in the garden, but I don’t spot him anywhere. Is he going to make himself scarce all day?
“Was everything to your satisfaction, Miss Ren?” Archie’s sudden presence snaps me out of my thoughts, causing me to startle in my chair.
