I slide to the floor, unable to comprehend what just happened. The tears, they never stop flowing. He’s gone. Archie is gone. How can I face my best friend knowing I’ll have to tell her that she’ll never get to see him again? I tuck my head between my knees, the sounds of the hospital fading into the background. That night plays in my mind on a loop, like a nightmare I can’t escape from.
THIRTY-FIVE
VERENA GRAVENHURST
Lying here in the arms of the man I’ve longed for on so many nights, I feel whole for the first time in my entire existence. Here, in this grey area between life and the beyond, I hold onto a love so divine, it would be worth dying for, over and over again. Loxen kisses the top of my head, and I nuzzle into his side. The moon hangs above us, the same way it did the first night we claimed this spot as our own. I could lie here with him, in the folds of time, for the rest of my life.
“Verena.” Loxen’s voice is soft but serious, as he brushes easy strokes over my hair. “I’m ready to tell you my story. The whole story. I shouldn’t have waited as long as I have, but we’re running out of time now, and you must know the truth.”
I press my cheek into his warm chest, close my eyes, and nod.
“I told you once that Ambrose found my mother’s beaten body on the side of the road, only half alive when she was just three months pregnant with me. But what I didn’t tell you was how she ended up there,” he explains, and I peer up at him. “She was left by my father. A man unworthy of being called a father at all, Charles Sullivan.”
The mention of the Sullivans sends a jerk of anxiety through me, and rekindles my memory of the last few things Reed uttered before taking my life. Something about Loxen’s mom, and taking back what was rightfully his. My brows furrow. “So then Reed…”
“Is my half-brother.”
And I’ve been dating him.
“Lox, I’m so sorry. I didn’t?—”
He huffs a laugh, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. “Of course, you didn’t know. Hell, I only found out last year,” he offers me a forced smile.
“How’d you find out?” I ask.
“When your mother died, your grandfather went a little…off the rails.” He glances back down at me.
“After five years of watching him spiral, I couldn’t bear to see him suffering any longer, so I started doing some sleuthing of my own, trying to dig up anything I could find to put his mind at ease. One day, I found a file on his desk about Charles. And in it, I found hundreds of misdeeds and crimes he’s committed over the years, just like the one you found. And in that file, sure enough, was an article about my mother, left injured with his unborn son. Ambrose knew all along, and he chose to give me and my mom a life we never would have had outside of the manor. While the prestigious families of Hollowcrest saw Ambrose as the villain, he was a hero to us. When he began looking into your mother’s death, he would do anything to find information, even if that meant crossing the other founding families to get it. Charles turned everyone against him, and after months into his research, I couldn’t watch him suffer any longer, following dead end after dead end. It was driving him mad, Verena. So, I joined the society.”
“You did what?” I raise my voice, sitting up straight.
“I needed the answers to the questions Ambrose couldn’t see. I told Reed the truth about his father and threatened to telleveryone if he didn’t let me in. I was initiated the next night. Two weeks later, Ambrose died, and my plan went to shit.”
“And, did you find the answers? Did you find out who caused the accident?” I shift nervously, searching his eyes. Sorrow fills them, and I know the answer before he says it.
“No.” He shakes his head, breaking his eyes away from mine. “Reed became violent and desperate for power, and before I could figure it out, he—” Something dark crossed over Loxen’s expression. His lips press into a flat line as he rubs the back of his neck, avoiding my eyes.
I slide my hand over his jaw, turning his head to face me, letting him know it’s safe to tell me.
“He what, Lox?”
His eyes bore into mine, and a long moment passes before he speaks again. “He killed me.”
The words steal the air from my lungs. My hand drops from his cheek.
Reed Killed Loxen.
Reed.Killed.Loxen.
I’ve been here, between life and death, for who knows how long, so consumed with the fact he’s here with me that I didn’t stop for one second to ask myselfhowLoxen got here in the first place. Bile churns in my stomach at the thought of me trusting, let alone kissing, a man like Reed. What the fuck was I thinking? I push myself from the ground, retrieving my dress, rumpled on the grass a few steps away from us. Anger burns hot under my skin as I pull it on quickly and wrap Loxen’s jacket around my shoulders.
Loxen gets to his feet, allowing me a moment to process everything he’s just told me before he speaks again. “Verena.”
Rapid, uncontrolled breaths expel from my body. I whip around to face him. “What?”
He leans against the tree, shirtless, in nothing but his trousers, and my heart aches at the sight.
“Come here,” he orders.
