They tried to figure out where Victor’s base of operations might be, derived from the information that they already had, but there wasn’t much to go on. There were a lot of isolated areas up in the mountains where they could be hiding. There had clearly been a concerted effort to make sure nobody could gather too much intel on this guy. Who did he have in his pocket? And how much harder was that going to make their job?
Much as Lawson was trying to stay focused, he found his mind drifting back to Sarah. He couldn’t stop thinking about the way she had looked at him before, the pain in her eyes when she had called him out and asked him if he really wanted her to stay.
If he’d had any sense, he would have told her yes, of course, he did, that he needed her here. That he would do anything to keep her around. But he couldn’t, not right now, not with everything that was going on.
And now, she was going. He had passed her cabin earlier, and had seen an open suitcase sitting on the bed, half-filled with her clothes. It had made his chest pang with regret, and he wished he could take it all back, wished he could just tell her how sorry he was and that he didn’t mean for it to happen like that, didn’t mean for her to actually leave.
Since everything that had gone down with Jed, he had been extra protective of her, and aware of just how vulnerable she was. Aware of just how much it would have hurt if something had happened to her.
When he had seen her right after the attack, the rage he’d felt had caught him off guard. He could normally control himself, even in the most impossible of situations, but with her, it was different. With her, his emotions took control, and he would have done anything to get revenge on the person who had done that to her.
Thinking back to their earlier conversation, he should have handled it better. Told her a little about the situation and asked if she’d be willing to take a short break. Hang out in town and concentrate on herself for a bit. Not make it seem like he didn’t want her around. Like he was kicking her out.
He knew it wouldn’t have been forever, butshehadn’t. Not the way he voiced his concerns. When they were done with their meeting, he could seek her out and try to explain. Because if something else happened to Sarah, he would never forgive himself.
But right now, he needed to stay on task. Finish going over the information with the guys and figure out a plan to take down Granger and his crew. Then he’d see where things stood with Sarah. The stakes were too high to get distracted right now.
Chapter Eight
As Sarah stuffed her clothes into her bag, she tried to ignore the women who were standing in the doorway, watching her pack.
“You don’t have to just pack up and go right this instant,” Bailey protested.
Sarah didn’t pay attention to her. She folded up a top with shaky hands, then tossed it into the pile. “Yes, I do,” Sarah replied through gritted teeth. “Lawson made that very clear.”
“He didn’t tell you to pack up and go today, did he?” River asked her.
Sarah paused. Okay, he hadn’t saidthatto her. In fact, after the kiss, he hadn’t said anything to her. But that had been more than enough for her to wrap her head around what he wanted, and she wasn’t going to hang out and pretend like she was fine being in a place she wasn’t wanted. “No, but—”
“Then you need to sit down for a second and take a breath,” Bailey told her as she put a hand on Sarah’s shoulder and guided her to the edge of the bed. “Talk to him. Figure this out. He probably didn’t mean it the way it sounded. You know how men can be…”
“Pigheaded?” Sarah retorted. “Arrogant? Mean?”
“I was going to say poor communicators,” Bailey replied, chuckling slightly. “I’m sure Lawson didn’t mean it to come across the way it did.”
Sarah took a deep breath and sighed.
“I know he really cares about you,” Bailey continued, as Sarah put her head in her hands. “There has to be something more tothis than what it seems on the surface. He wouldn’t just kick you out like that, with such little warning.”
“He thinks it’s for my own good,” Sarah said, rolling her eyes. “So I can recover from…you know, from everything that happened with Jed.”
“So he’s got the right intentions, then?” River asked.
“Yeah, he just wants you to get better,” Bailey told her.
Sarah frowned. “By leaving this place?” she asked. “I don’t see how that would work. I don’t want to go. This is my home.”
Both of the women fell silent for a moment, and then, River cut in once more.
“I don’t see why you should have to leave to do that,” she pointed out. “I mean, the internet is a thing. You could do therapy online. You shouldn’t have to leave if you don’t want to.”
“My thoughts exactly,” Sarah replied, smiling up at River thankfully.
“And, I don’t know about everyone else, but I’d miss having you around,” River added. Bailey put an arm around Sarah and gave her a squeeze.
“I would, too,” she agreed. Sarah leaned her head on her shoulder for a moment, feeling another rush of emotion.
She’d never be able to cope with being away from her friends. The support and comfort she got from them was irreplaceable. She had never felt more accepted and safer than she did there at the lodge. The thought of leaving them and her home, even if only for a little while, made her chest ache. It just didn’t feel fair. No matter what Lawson’s motivations might have been for trying to encourage her to leave, they felt cruel to her.
