"It is none of your concern," he snapped. "Only be certain of this: No woman will ever call mehusband. No woman will ever wield power over me."
Why did his vow suddenly make her sad? That this man would never have anyone to hold him, touch him, meet him on his return from battle, her eyes shining a welcome. He would have no woman to feed the hidden, hungry, tender places in his soul, no children clamoring for tales of his bravery on the field. Simple, homely offices Caitlin had dreamed of performing as a lone girl.
But Niall would only scoff if ever he guessed that she pitied him. Even in the glow of the firelight, Caitlin could see his face darken, as if he knew how ridiculously dismayed he had appeared. His chagrin was so great she was tempted to laugh.
"Since you are so certain Conn would not force you to marry against your will, it is possible that Conn does not intend to see me wed, either."
"And why is that so? There is an army of other men in Glenfluirse."
"Few who would accept a woman who comes to marriage with empty hands." She shrugged. "I am not so simple that I do not know the ways of the world. A wife has a duty to bring something to marriage—wealth, the honor of her family, allies to help guard her husband's borders. I canoffer none of these things." She took some small comfort in the thought.
Niall dashed it as he shrugged. "Any man in the kingdom except me would rejoice to have you as wife."
"I cannot imagine why."
"You bring a bride price far more precious than land or riches to the man who weds you. His sons will carry the blood of the finest spear caster ever to go into battle."
All thought of a dreaded marriage vanished. She caught her breath. "You know of my father? My family?"
Niall picked at the bread he held, suddenly engrossed, as if the crumbs held all the answers in the world. "There is time enough for you to learn of such things when you reach the fortress."
"You cannot mean that!" Unable to contain herself, she cast her bread onto the crumpled cloth sack and then leapt to her feet, her hands trembling. "I have waited my whole life to know why my parents left me alone, why I had no mother, no father like other girls."
"It is not my place to tell you anything. I was not instructed to—"
"Were you instructednotto?" she demanded. "Is there something to hide?"
"Nay, but—woman, you are snarling everything up again."
"Iam snarling things up? My whole life has been a tangle! You cannot imagine what it is like, always wondering, half fearing the answers, needing them anyway. But now... they... my family... perhaps they are at the fortress. I will meet them at last." She hugged herself tight, fear and delight warring inside her.
She saw Niall's eyes narrow, an odd expression crossing his features. He hesitated. "You will not find your parents at the fortress, Caitlin."
"They are someplace else, then? It does not matter. I can still find them."
He looked away. Caitlin stilled, bereft. Her voice trembled as she whispered. "They are..."
"Dead." He said the word so she would not have to, a gentle mercy in this man so battle-hardened.
She turned her face away from Niall to hide the glitter of tears. Silence fell. A log broke apart, raining embers. "Strange. Reverend Mother gave this to me before we left Saint Mary's." She touched the bracelet "It must have belonged to my mother. All my life, I dreamed of my parents, wove images of them out of all my wishes. Made them beautiful and handsome, brave and noble, amother and father who loved me so desperately—who would hold me, touch me, tell me why they abandoned me. For a moment, they were real. They were mine. And now, in an instant, they are gone forever. I never even had the chance to know them. Now I never will."
"You are wrong." She was stunned to feel the touch of his hand against her arm. "They will live in bard song for all eternity."
She looked down at him, saw the reluctance in him, yet he continued. "You are daughter of the mighty Fintan MacShane, a warrior so fine it is said he possessed fairy magic."
She brushed his hand away. "I do not want tales of fairies and magic any longer. I spun enough of my own. I wanted someone to touch, to hold."
"It is no fantasy, what I tell you of your father. It is true."
Something in his voice made her look at Niall. "You knew him? "
"I think no one but his wife, Grainne, really knew him. He was always separated from the other warriors by his gift."
"He was a spear caster? That is what you said. Why should that set him apart?"
"Never once, in all his life, did he miss what heaimed for. An amazing enough feat in itself, but that was not the miracle of it. Fintan was blind."
"Blind? That—that is impossible! How could he even know where he pointed his weapon?"
