CHAPTER 12
The leather cover ofMrs. Dale’s Compendium of Flowersmust have borne the imprints of Selina’s fingertips by now; she was gripping it so hard as she walked away from the manor.
Through the walled gardens, winter gardens, ornamental gardens, and lawned gardens she marched, no real destination in her mind. The walking mattered, not where. She would walk all the way back to London if that was how long it took to clear her mind of Philip and his kiss.
A rickety wooden gate put her on a dirt path that snaked through an orchard. Through the twisting trunks of apple trees, she glimpsed the glitter of a lake.
Shall I just throw myself in and see if the cold shock can’t jolt me out of this stupor?
It was a tempting idea.
A cool breeze swept across the shimmering water and toyed with the loose strands of her hair, the light brush of it tempering the heat in her face. So long as she didn’t imagine that the sweet caress was Philip’s fingertips or the flutter of his lips, maybe she would be able to calm down.
The smooth top of a large, flat rock called to her. An ideal place to perch awhile and rid herself of improper thoughts.
“Where was I?” she muttered, flipping through the pages of the flower book.
She had been reading about orchids before Philip had interrupted her. Bee orchids. Beautiful, sneaky flowers that mimicked the shape of the bees they wanted to draw to them.
Am I no better than a bee, drawn by a handsome face?
She groaned and slammed the book shut. It was no good. She would not be able to concentrate on a single word or illustration, not wheneverythingkept sending her mind back to him.
“Why do I care if I must share him? Why do I care if I am not the only one?” she mumbled to the wind.
As Mary had alluded, most men weren’t faithful, and Philip was far more handsome and enticing than most men.Of coursehe wasn’t faithful.Of coursehe drew ladies to him, and they were helpless to resist his mysterious charm.
“If I had risked my life for my country for years, I probably wouldn’t care much for society’s rules either. I would want to enjoy myself however I pleased,” she tried to reason with herself, to ease the tension in her chest. The part of her that strained with an almost pre-emptive jealousy.
I’ve only just met the man, for goodness’ sake!
She put her hand to her chest and rubbed soothing circles, though it didn’t do much good.
The truth was, she should never have kissed him. The kiss was responsible for all of this confusion and unease. If she had kept her distance, kept herself detached from the idea of him, she wouldn’t be flapping and fretting now.
“This is your fault for being a stupid bee, Selina,” she scolded quietly, shaking her head. “If you hadn’t been so greedy as to try the nectar, you wouldn’t be bothered about sharing it or who has been there before you… and might be after you. You would be buzzing about, content not to know about?—”
“Ahoy there!”
She clamped her lips shut, burning with embarrassment. Shoulders up in a flinch, she whipped around to find two familiar figures waving at her from the orchard.
“Melody?!” she shrieked and jumped off the rock.
The third of their trio, Melody Wynn, stood a head taller than the other two, with raven-black hair that she rarely curled or styled, and spectacles that were forever slipping down her freckled nose. Willowy of figure, she often blamed her studies, too engrossed in her passion for the natural world to remember to eat.
“I thought you’d enjoy the surprise!” Lizzy called out, the two approaching the lakeshore.
“How did you know I was here?” Selina asked, hesitant. “Has news reached the tonso swiftly?”
Melody tipped her head toward Lizzy. “She sent a rider. I came as soon as I could.”
“We are having a house party!” Lizzy said with a grin that didn’t quite reach her anxious eyes. “Naturally, I invited Melody first, but other invitations have been sent out.”
Selina’s jaw dropped. “You didwhat?”
“It was before I knew you weren’t altogether happy with the arrangement.” Lizzy had the decency to look somewhat chagrined, an unusual expression on her ordinarily confident face.
“She got overexcited,” Melody translated.
