Dreams of starlit escapades by the pool filter out as the afternoon sun illuminates the room.
I’m warm and cosy. Wrapped up tightly in whatever bedding I used. I never sleep this late– or sleep much at all at the moment– but I can’t deny I feel much more refreshed now that I’ve actually slept.
Until I realise the pillow I’m laying on is moving, that it’s not in fact a pillow, but a person.
Fuck.
Everything comes rushing back to my memory. Everything is doused with a bit of blood. Until I get to the end of the events. How Cyrus wrapped me up so tightly in her arms and got me to sleep within minutes. How she made me feel safe and secure, just by being near.
I have no idea if she’s sleeping or awake, so I do the natural thing– hold still and pretend to still be asleep, whilst my brain works a hundred miles a minute. I needed her help earlier, but right now it’s in my best interest to protect my heart and get out of here.
So why is running from her the last thing on my mind?
Stupid heart trying to get what it so desperately wants.
I think I’m getting away with pretending, until Cyrus’s hand palms the back of my head, fingers threading through my hair. Whines try to pour out of me, but I lock those bitches down. There’s no way I can let her know she still affects me so much. Unless she’s suddenly had a change of heart– which I highly doubt– nothing will be different from the last time.
“I can hear you thinking.”
Busted.
I sigh, doing my best to sit up and move away from Cyrus’s hold. She holds firm at first before giving in and letting go of me. Almost like she wanted me to stay, before she remembered how much she damaged me the last time she was here.
Her eyes are still trained on me, still soft and warm. None of her stone-likeness is there. Even when we were fucking, she’s never been this expressive. It’s giving me whiplash.
Seeing her emotion is beautiful.
However, it’s tearing my heart to pieces with each new look I learn. Because I know she won’t be around long enough for me to learn them all.
I stay quiet letting my thoughts run wild, while she continues to watch me. I must be being too quiet as she speaks again. “How are you feeling?”
My lips blow a raspberry as I exhale. Everything is too much but now I’ve actually slept, it feels easier to process it all. Well, process everything else except for her.
“Better. I just want to know who's doing this. If it is Hago, then we need to find out how deep this goes. I don’t think he’s smart enough to be doing all this alone. It’s kind of terrifying knowing what their end goal is.” I take a deep breath, closing my eyes before I continue. “And it’s terrifying not knowing how much it’s worked so far. How many people are starting to believe I can no longer do the job I was raised to do?”
Cyrus’s hand finds mine.
The warmth penetrates deep within my bones.
I never want her to let go.
Instead, I enjoy one more squeeze before pulling my hand away. She controls a flinch, but I see the movement either way. Then she nods, as if accepting whatever this is.
She clears her throat before continuing. “We’ll find whoever this is, then we’ll show everyone why you’re the leader here. I won’t let anyone hurt you. That’s a promise.”
The thing is, deep down I know she means it. Her promise hits deep, wrapping around my bruised heart. But how is she going to not let anyone hurt me, when she’s the reason my heart no longer belongs to me?
Shaking my head, I throw any thoughts relating to Cyrus from my skull. Not the time. No, right now I need to get my head on straight and start attacking this problem head on.
Pushing up from the bed, I head to the window. Throwing open the panes of glass and sniffing the fresh air.
Watching the ocean hit the shore, breaking between jagged rocks and sending salt spray into the open air. Even from here I can smell the salt floating on the wind. Hear the gentle rustle of trees and leaves as the wind blows them about. The clomping of the horses in the stable close by. The sails on the Burnt Bones, the black flag with a skull on fire, lapping on the breeze.
It’s the best reset I could ask for.
I need a plan. “I need to open the tavern soon. You can work the bar with me, keep an eye on everyone. Liquor is the best way to get people to talk.”
“Okay. I’ll get some of the crew to space themselves around, see if they can eavesdrop enough to catch anything.” When I turn, I can see Cyrus formulating different scenarios to how this will play out.
