My body wilted.
“Mom, yes, we’ve been dating. We haven’t gotten to the point of calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend. I like Sam. He’s been easy to talk to, and we have fun. He surprisedme with how non-traditional he is. His family is like ours, and they’ve pushed him to find a woman who would fit their image of the perfect daughter-in-law. Sam appreciates my independence.”
“That sounds wonderful. So you and he are getting serious. You see this going to the ultimate point of an engagement and then marriage?” she asked.
I opened my mouth to agree, but no words left me. Instead, I snapped it shut.
“Ah, okay, now we’re getting somewhere. Is there someone else? Someone you find more to your liking than Sam? Who is he?”
“I didn’t say that,” I protested.
“You didn’t have to. Your face does. Tell me about him,” she urged.
Mom had always kept my confidence. I had no reason to believe she’d run back to the rest of our family and narc me out. But what should I tell her? There was no personal relationship between Reign and me. Her hiked eyebrow told me to spill, so I did. Maybe she’d help me make sense of what I felt and get me to stop with my inappropriate thoughts about Reign.
“He’s a patient of mine. I met him around the same time I met Sam. He came for treatment. I’ve seen him for three weeks. There’s something about him that I'm drawn to. He’s not Indian, but he has a difficult brother that he struggles with. He runs a successful company. We’ve had good conversations while I treat him.”
“That sounds promising, so what’s the problem?”
“He hasn’t indicated he sees me as anything other than his doctor. Yet, I can’t stop thinking about him. And they’re way more than friendship thoughts. Anyway, when Reign, that’s his name, was called by Morgana to cancel his appointment on Thursday, she told him I’d been hurt. That was all. Reign tookit upon himself to have his PA call around until she found which hospital I was in. He showed up in my room later that morning. He was concerned and unhappy that I’d been hurt.”
When I paused, Mom spoke. “Oh, that sounds promising. A man doesn’t go to all that trouble for someone he sees as his chiropractor.”
I groaned. “Mom.”
“What? I’m just saying,” she smiled.
“You’re supposed to be talking sense into me, not getting my hopes up even more,” I chided.
“Well, I can’t help you then because I see that as the action of a man who is interested in you personally, not merely professionally. So, what happened? Did he admit to anything during the visit?”
“No, he didn’t get a chance before Sam showed up. After that, Reign excused himself, said he would see me soon, and left. However, Sam left the room a minute or so later. He was gone for ten minutes. When he came back, I knew he had lied about where he went. He claimed to have asked a nurse when I could go home. Sam said the nurse didn’t know. The thing is, I spoke to the staff first thing that morning. The doctor said I could leave on Friday if everything stayed the same. The nurses knew it. Sam hung around for about forty-five minutes, then excused himself. He said he had to get to work, but he’d see me soon.”
“Okay, maybe he got someone who didn’t know the plan,” Mom suggested.
“I thought the same, so after he left and had time to get to the office, I called and asked to speak to him. I was told that he had taken the day off and wouldn’t be back until Monday. I refused to leave a message. I hadn’t even told the person who answered who I was. He lied about going to work, Mom.”
Mom sat there, thinking hard. She wore a frown I couldn’t figure out. Anxiety bubbled inside of me, waiting to hear what she had to say.
“Stasia, I know that Arish, your dad, and the others all support you and Sam. He presents as a nice man. However, I’ve been worried. My gut feels uneasy whenever he’s mentioned. I heard Arish and Savar talking about how Sam is exactly what you need. That with him, you’ll realize that the family’s guidance was right. I keep making excuses for what it could mean.
“The night you came to dinner, and Sam was there, was set up by your brother and dad. I was told at the last minute that we were having a guest. I saw them whispering before Sam arrived, looking smug. Meeting Sam, I wanted to put it down to the fact that he’s a lawyer and Indian. I don’t believe that’s it. I feel like he’s hiding something, that they all are. I’m not saying this to make you stop seeing Sam. If he’s what you want, and you’re sure of his intentions, then do what makes you happy.
“However, if you have doubts about him or this Reign makes you want to explore the possibility of a relationship with him instead, then do that. It’s your happiness at stake. The family will either deal or not. You don’t owe us your entire life. I regret that I allowed myself to step back and let your dad dictate so much of our family’s direction. He molded Arish into his image. And your sisters are content to bow to whatever makes their dad and husbands happy. You’re not them, Stasia, and you shouldn’t compromise yourself.”
I was shocked. Mom had never spoken like this before. I always thought she happily followed Dad no matter what, even if she did try to shield me in small ways.
“Mom, I don’t know what to say. I never thought you were against Dad’s traditions. Do you regret marrying Dad?”
She sighed. “I love Savar, but I should’ve fought for a more equal relationship and not permitted him to dictate. If that meant we never married, then it would’ve been what was meant to be. As you get older, you’ll find that loving someone by itself isn’t enough to be happy, fulfilled, and have a strong foundation.”
I sat there letting what she revealed sink in. Afterward, I voiced my concern.
“What if Reign only likes me in a platonic way? Or it’s merely a sexual desire to hook up and then move on. I’m not into a relationship like that. And the way he occupies my mind, I’d only want a long-term connection, even if it wasn’t destined to end in marriage.”
“You and Reign need to sit down and talk. Ask those questions. Speak honestly. Lay out what you need and want, and hear what he wants and needs in return. It’s the only way you’ll know.”
Mom was quiet after dropping the unexpected on me. She stayed but gave me space and uninterrupted time to mull over what I wanted to do. If I had a question, I’d ask, but otherwise we were together yet apart. And it wasn’t a bit tense.
