AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I felt like the biggest jackass on the planet. I’d been so stupid, so selfish. I needed to stop that. I needed to grow up. “I don’t know. I didn’t think of it that way. I just…I guess I thought you’d replace me and move on. I didn’t think it would be a big deal…”
Evan’s mouth dropped wide open. “Are you high? It is a big deal. We can’t just replace you. You’re not something that we can run down to the store and get another one of on a whim. There are no D-Bags without you.” Careful not to hurt me, he placed his hand on my shoulder. “You say this is our band, but I’m not an idiot. It’s not ours. This is your band, because you’re the only one of us who truly is irreplaceable. And we will follow you to the ends of the earth, Kellan, because we believe in you. Don’t you get that?”
With a disgruntled noise, he shoved my shoulder away from him. I took a step back as his words sank in. Irreplaceable? Me? That didn’t sound right. I felt extremely…replaceable. My bandmates had never been anything but honest, patient, accepting, and incredibly loyal though. We’re your family now. Get that through your damn skull! I was an idiot. Evan was right. We were family.
Thinking about my new family brought to mind a startling statement that Evan had made about my old one. Your real parents may have been shit…Shoving aside my lingering insecurities, I asked, “How do you know about my parents?”
Evan’s expression softened as he answered me. “You told me, Kellan.” I tilted my head in confusion. I never talked about them to anyone. Denny only knew because he’d witnessed the abuse. Evan understood my bewilderment and explained. “You were completely shit-faced at the time, so you probably don’t remember. It was after you saw the house they left you…after you saw that all your stuff was gone. You told me that they’d moved and hadn’t let you know. I was pretty surprised by that, but…then you told me what they used to do to you.”
By the horrified look on his face, I was guessing I’d been pretty graphic. Shit. I’d told him. He knew. Did that mean…everyone else did too? “Did you…Did you tell…?”
He shook his head. “No, I didn’t tell anybody else. It’s not my story to tell,” he said with a shrug.
I closed my eyes as relief washed over me. I didn’t want to be looked at like a victim. I didn’t want to see the sympathy on people’s faces. I didn’t want to answer questions. I didn’t want to think about it. I thought about it enough. “Thank you. I don’t…I don’t talk about it…”
“Maybe you should?” Evan quietly asked.
I peeked up at him. His brown eyes were soft with compassion. “Maybe…” I whispered. Someday. When it doesn’t hurt so much. Although, it had been easier than I’d thought it would be to talk to Kiera. That was different though. She was different.
After Evan left to get my car, I stepped into the bathroom and changed. I examined my face in the mirror when I was dressed again. Damn, Denny did a number on me. Dad had usually stayed away from my face; he preferred bruising me in places that weren’t so obvious. Denny hadn’t cared about being discreet, and my face was a detailed map of his fury.
A gash in my lip split it in two, which made smiling, talking, doing just about anything with my mouth painful. My cheek was cut, bruising, and being held together by surgical tape. One eye was near swollen shut, and would be completely black and blue in a few days. The other had a cut above it that was also taped together. Add that to my broken arm, broken ribs, and more bruises and scrapes than I could count, and I was a complete and total mess.
Shoving my dirty clothes into the bag, I stepped back into the room. Denny looked over at me; he seemed a little relieved that I wasn’t covered in blood anymore. “Evan left?” he asked.
I nodded as I sat back down in my chair. “Yeah. He’s bringing my car back here.”
Denny looked thoughtful for a moment, then said, “I should have gone with him. I could have driven him out there…”
“No offense, but I don’t think he wants to be around you right now.” I tried to put that as politely as possible, but I was pretty sure Evan was still shocked by my appearance. And Kiera’s.
Denny sighed and studied his hands. After a moment of silence, I said, “I know I don’t have the right to ask, but…what are your plans now?”
He kept his eyes on his hands, and several seconds passed before he answered me. “I’m going to take the job in Australia. I’m going to go home.”
I swallowed the lump in my throat, the pain in my chest. Even after everything, I would miss him when he left. I knew I couldn’t ask him to reconsider though. “Oh…And Kiera? Are you going to take her with you? Once she’s…better.” It hurt even worse to ask him that, but I couldn’t stop the words from exiting my mouth. I needed to know what her future held.
Denny looked up at Kiera, then looked over at me. “No. I’m going home alone.”
My eyes drifted over to Kiera; her bandaged skull did nothing to diminish her beauty. This would shatter her, when she woke up. She has to wake up. “You’re going to break up with her?”
Denny scoffed. “I don’t think we ever truly got back together after she broke up with me when I was in Tucson, but…yes, I’m going to end it. She’s all yours,” he muttered under his breath.
I wasn’t sure if he’d meant for me to hear that, but I had, and it brought up some conflicting emotions. With Denny out of the way, I probably could have her…but did I want her? Yes, I did. But not like this. I wanted her to choose me because I was the one she wanted. That wasn’t going to happen though. We were over too.
Time ticked on. Kiera occasionally moved, occasionally groaned, but she never opened her eyes. Late that night, she finally spoke though. Eyelids flickering like she was having a nightmare, she muttered, “No…” followed by “Kellan…don’t go…”
My eyes were wide as I stared at her in shock. I was thrilled she’d spoken, and amazed that she was thinking about me in her medicated daze. Feeling hopeful that she really was getting better, I looked over at Denny. I was about to ask him if he’d heard her, but his expression made it clear he had. He didn’t look as happy as me.
Meeting my eyes, he stood from the bed. “Why don’t you come over here and sit by her?”
I started to bunch my brows together, but it hurt, so I stopped. “Are you sure?”
Denny nodded, then looked out the window. “It’s getting late. She seems to be getting better, so I think I’m…yeah, I’m gonna go home. Maybe pack up some stuff.”
That got me out of the chair. “Where are you gonna go?”
From the sudden glint in his eye, I thought he might tell me it was none of my business, and really, it wasn’t, but he let out a sigh and told me anyway. “I think I’ll see if I can crash with Sam for a while.”
Not knowing what to say to that, I simply nodded. In the silence, Denny gathered his jacket, gave Kiera a soft kiss on her forehead, and started to leave. Before he was all the way out the door, I called out, “Denny…I’m sorry.”
He stopped in the doorway, then nodded. His back still turned to me, he said, “I’ll be back in the morning. Call me…if anything changes.” He left without waiting for an answer.
Once he was gone, I sat beside Kiera on the bed. Grabbing her hand, I whispered, “I’m here, baby. I’m not going anywhere.”
Chapter 32
Permanent
When Denny returned the next morning, he was smiling. I thought that was kind of strange, considering the circumstances. “You seem…chipper,” I told him, keeping my eyes on Kiera.
Denny sighed as he stood by Kiera’s head. “I’m not. Not really. I just…I took the job. I’m starting in a couple weeks.”
“Oh…congratulations.” Peeking up at him, I asked, “Did Sam take you in?”
Denny glanced at me from the corner of his eye. “Yeah. I didn’t go into a lot of detail, just said Kiera and I broke up.”
After he said that, Kiera moved, and her eyelids fluttered open. We both leaned forward. “Kiera?” I said, grabbing her hand.
“Kellan?” she whispered, then her eyes drifted shut again.
Denny’s gaze shifted between the two of us. “I’m gonna…get something to eat. Want anything?” I shook my head. All I wanted was for Kiera to open her eyes, look at me, and smile in a way that would let me know everything was okay.
The doctors came in, removed her bandages, and said the swelling was down and she should wake up anytime, but it wasn’t until the following morning that she finally did.
I was talking to a nurse in the hallway when Denny approached. He’d spent the night at Sam’s again last night, while I’d stayed at the hospital. I thanked the nurse for all her helpful information, which really wasn’t that much. All they kept telling me was Wait and see. Time will tell. It’s up to Kiera now. I was really sick of those kinds of answers. I wanted to know the exact minute she was going to wake up and be herself again. It was beyond frustrating that no one could tell me that.
