He doesn’t do things he doesn’t mean.
The sentence lands again. Lower this time.
That’s the part I don’t want. Not the kiss. Not the photo. Not even the fallout. The possibility that he meant it and I believe he did.
I put one hand flat against the notebook. Then the other.
Grounding, apparently. Didn’t know I needed grounding. Good to know.
I don’t open it. I don’t write anything down. I sit with it exactly as it is. Because I know exactly what she’s saying. I just don’t want to follow it all the way through.
Eventually I stand. My legs feel normal. Annoyingly.
I leave.
Dina is on the steps when I get home. Nine PM, unbothered as ever.
I don’t bother with the bowl ritual tonight. I just sit, and she lets me, and that’s its own kind of strange.
It all comes out anyway. The photo. The parking lot. Riley’s three words landing like a door closing.
Aurora texting about coffee like we’re just normal people having a normal week. The series win and the noise in my chest that I wasn’t ready for. Him finding Aurora first across the ice — the specific look on his face when he did, the thing that went somewhere and left something realer behind it.
Dina finishes eating. Sits. Takes one step toward me. Stops. Disappears into the dark.
I sit there for a while.
I go inside. Open my personal notebook. Read the line I wrote this morning. Close it.
I pick up my phone. Look at the photo one more time. The way I didn’t pull back. The way he didn’t either.
I put it down. I don’t delete it.
My phone lights up.
Unknown contact — except it isn’t unknown. I put his number in three weeks ago and told myself it was professional, for the access, for the story, for any reason except the real one.
Brick sat in your spot on the couch tonight.
I read it twice.
I have never been to his place. I don’t have a spot.
I type three different replies. Delete all of them. I’m sitting on my kitchen floor and I don’t remember deciding to do that.
I stare at that for a long time.
Then I type:
Tell Brick I said that spot is disputed territory.
I hit send before I can talk myself out of it.
The reply comes less than a minute later.
Jax:
He says bring legal representation.
