The conversation idled while the next performer came out, and I let my mind wander.
It was no surprise that it wandered right to Braden Lock.
I couldn’t get the tall motherfucker to vacate the premises of my brain, not since that night at auditions. He was the only reason I hated the no fraternization rule. Not because I felt the same as Marcus — I wasn’t looking for a husband, I knew better than to think I had much of anything to offer in the way of domesticity — but because I wanted that man to rail me six ways to Sunday.
I loved how I could push his buttons already, how he pretended not to be affected by me, but his body told another story.
I wanted to tease him again. I wanted to flirt with him and test the boundary that had been drawn so clearly between us. I wanted to see his stubble-lined jaw clench with restraint, to find out just how much he could take.
I wondered if he’d be one of the players at the flag football event.
And I found myself wishing against logic that he would be.
Braden
“All right, girls,” I said, clapping my hands together as we all gathered in a huddle. “That last drive was good, but we can do better. Jasmine, make sure you’re looking for the ball as you run your route. Once you cut, eyes up and searching, yeah?”
The young girl nodded, her eyes fierce with determination.
“And Mack, you’ve got to call out loud and clear what the play is. Some of the O-Line was confused on that last drive. We want to make sure everyone is on the same page, and that starts with you as QB.”
Mackenzie looked around to her teammates with a nod of a promise, too.
“All right. Hands in. Let’s go get a tuddy!” I said, and then a pile of hands covered mine before we lifted them into the air on three, yelling “Her!”
I jogged off to the sideline then, folding my arms as I watched the first play of the drive unfold. Mackenzie called out the play loud and clear, and then the team perfectly executed a vertical that got us a first down and then some.
I smiled as the girls celebrated, the flags at their hips fluttering in the wind before they were lining up for the next play.
I understood why Zeke and Riley got into this — helping young girls see their potential role in the NFL, and in football as a whole. There was something so powerful about influencing the youth, about teaching them something and watching them light up when it all clicked into place.
It had been hard at first, accepting that our friends weren’t going to join us in the NFL. Both of them would have been incredible — Riley maybe more than any of us. But it was admirable that instead, they chose to work together to open the door for other women who wanted to work in football — no matter what capacity that might have been at.
Being at an event like this, I couldn’t help but think about my friends and how lucky I was to have them. I loved my family —God,did I love my mom, my dad, and my sister — but I was also robbed of what most would consider a normal childhood.
I grew up fast — faster than I should have — and sure, there were things I missed along the way. But I didn’t regret the way that experience shaped me, or the man it forced me to become.
Still, I was wound so tight I could barely walk when I first showed up to North Boston University. And I wouldn’t claim to anyone that I suddenly lightened up and became a new person when I went to NBU to play college ball, but I would say that the teammates I found there and the family we made together… well, they gave me something I never thought I’d have in my life.
Safety. Stability. A place to land when I was tired and scared.
I loved them, and presently found myself aching for the days when we saw each other every day in Boston.
I pulled my phone out in-between plays and texted the group chat.
Me:At the flag football event and there was a girl working on kicks who said she wants to be just like Riley Collins when she grows up.
Zeke:That’s my girl.
Riley:So sweet. How’s it going?
Me:It’s really fun. These girls are great.
Kyle:How are the cheerleaders? *smirk emoji*
Me:Wouldn’t know.
Kyle:Sure, bud. And I got eight hours of sleep last night.
