“Do you believe them?” she whispered so faintly she wondered if he heard.
Deckard adjusted his seating, bringing his lips down to press against her temple. “About what?” he murmured.
“About the creatures,” she said. “Do you think the Alliance expects them to return?”
He was silent for several seconds, and she could feel the conflict within him, though she couldn’t name all the emotions within it. Hesitation, worry, and...anger?
“I don’t know what to think,” he replied at last, voice low in her ear. “But I’m beginning to doubt this mission of ours.”
Evylin tensed. “Why?”
“At every turn, we learn of another secret they’re keeping,” he whispered. “I don’t trust the Alliance. I don’t trust their aims.”
Unsure how much trust she placed in the organization herself, Evylin scanned the camp as she reflected on Deckard’s cynicism. Near her, Ethenn lay beside Ilain, their backs pressed against one another. It was an odd sort of intimacy, different from the way she and Deckard were, but still affectionate. And it tugged at Evylin in the strangest way.
These people had become part of their lives. After their months of travel, Ilain felt like a sister to her as surely as Ethenn had become a brother. Even Auden held a place in her heart. They’d fought together, survived together. They’d shared their knowledge and trained them as best they could. Everything the pair did was in pursuit of a better world, spurred on by the love of their brother, who sat in their camp now, sacrificing his own life along with his wife to see that future come to pass for their daughter.
Whatever the Alliance’s aims, Evylin had to trust in the goodness of the Calders. Because if people as loving and loyal as the family existed, she wanted to stand by their side.
Evylin looked up at Deckard, softening her gaze. She set a hand on the side of his face, keeping him near. “I think you’re wrong,” she whispered. “They do not maliciously keep secrets. Whenever we ask, they’re forthcoming. It’s just that we haven’t thought to ask these questions until now.”
His demeanor didn’t ease, and she could see he didn’t believe in the Calders’ goodness in the same way.
Remembering Hewitt’s advice, Evylin gave him a tender smile. “Do you truly not trust the Alliance? Or is this just your frustration with their hopes for us?”
Deckard flinched, and his emotion flared, but he took a deep breath, steadying himself before responding. “Can not both reasons be true?” he asked.
“Of course they can,” she said. “But as I can sense your feelings on this topic, I have a strong suspicion that it’s not the case.”
With a sigh, he brought his forehead to hers. He didn’t bother speaking. Not now, when his emotions did that for him. His very essence was heavy, weighted down with concern, disappointment, and frustration. Evylin didn’t know what caused this exact turmoil within him, but she wanted to soothe it away.
She whispered his name, brushing her thumb along his jaw. “Once, you told me not to worry about the future, to focus on our mission, and then we’d figure it out—together. Now, I’m telling you to do the same. Think about the Relics. Think about saving our country. Whatever comes after, we’ll be together. And that’s all that matters.”
Deckard drew her closer. He took solace in her, his mood tempering as she held him.
The soft snorts of sleeping horses and the gentle trickle of the stream echoed in the cavern. Vayden hummed a low, soothing tune. The cold, damp air pricked their skin. And Evylin forced herself to believe her own words. Deckard couldn’t know her doubts; he couldn’t feel that she was as uncertain as he. She trusted the Calders, but that didn’t make her any happier about the expectations of the Alliance.
Whatever came, yes, they would be together. But thatwasn’tall that mattered. And the future wasn’t guaranteed.
Once Deckard and Evylin lay down for the night, she stayed awake in his arms for far longer than usual, wondering: Between Relics and thrones, politics and magic, wars and rebellions, would they have any future at all?
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
4TH OF RADIA, 1574
After spending the night in the caverns, the troop entered Ephria at last. Deckard was thrilled to be back on their half of the continent. Not only were the Ephrians home again, but their nights under the stars were also almost entirely behind them. There would be times here and there through the rest of their journey that they’d stop at settlements that had no inns or rooms for rent, and they’d still need to keep a keen eye out for Blount and his men. But now that they were back in Ephria and on friendly ground, the group could move with far more freedom.
However, that fact didn’t make Deckard any more relaxed. Constantly, his mind pestered him with the reminder that they were in a race against time. Blount’s determination to retrieve the Relics put undue pressure on their mission. If the cruel prince wasn’t involved, they would have no cause for such expediency. They could take their time, determining whether the Alliance was worthy of service or if they should leave them behind as soon as possible.
Instead, Deckard was forced to make a rash decision, supporting this organization regardless of his lack of understanding of their true aims. He didn’t like that. The mounting questions about the organization caused him greaterworry with each passing day. He feared toppling the sum of everything he knew and the country he’d sworn to serve in exchange for a questionable government.
After their conversation the previous night, it was now clear to Deckard that he couldn’t discuss the topic with Evylin. She wasn’t worried about their circumstances. Deckard couldn’t help thinking sourly that it was just like her, being carefree and unconcerned about the intricacies of politics. She’d never been interested in those things; instead, she trusted others to guide her.
Though to be fair, she wasn’t letting Deckard determine her opinion on this. She’d made her own choice to trust the Alliance based on her relationship with the Calders.
The problem was that Deckard didn’t trust the Calders all that much either. They were fine people and a dedicated family, but with only three months of acquaintance during which they’d lied and duped them into service, there wasn’t much to recommend their honorability in his mind. Yes, he liked Auden and Ilain. Yes, he found Vayden and Isla companionable. No, he didn’t trust a single one of them.
Under the cheery morning sun, Deckard scanned the rocky, tree-studded terrain of the foothills ahead. After a full day of travel, the mountain range would be behind them, though it would take the rest of their day’s travel to get truly free of its rugged grasp upon the land. Then they would return to the lush grasses and open plains of Ephria’s heartland.
