“No, that’s for both of us. The question is for you, so I get something in return.”
Ilain tapped a finger over her skirt. “Let’s hear it, then I’ll decide.”
“I’m going to continue to train with Brea.” Her expression tightened, but he went on. “I have to improve as a Warrior, Ilain. If I’m going to be your Warrior, I have tobebetter. And as much as it hurts you right now, that means I have to work with the one woman who can help me become that.”
She hesitated, a wry smile tugging at her lips. “So I have to be rational about your training, but I get to be irrational by distracting myself with your kisses?” she surmised.
“Something like that.”
A weak laugh slipped out of her. She stared across the room, a haunted expression on her face. Her vibrant curls drifted over her tense shoulders. It was plain to see that the request hurt her. She was so intelligent and cunning that sometimes Ethenn forgot how reactive and emotional she also was. Like the resource she connected with, Ilain was full of passion, violence, and insatiable need. And it drove her to these dramatic swings in reason, no matter how wise she might truly be.
Slowly, Ilain turned back to him. “Fine,” she said softly.
“You’ll accept the deal?” Ethenn wasn’t sure whether he felt more excited or disappointed.
“Yes, I accept it.” Her sharp eyebrows lifted slyly. “Do I get to ask my question now?”
He nodded.
Her fingers latched onto his forearm, tracing his sleeve. “How did you get your scars?”
Ethenn gritted his teeth but said, “In my uncle’s smithy.” Ilain’s glare flashed, immediately incensed by his repeated answer, but he interrupted her sharp reply. “He gave them to me.”
Her eyes widened. “Your uncle . . .burnedyou?”
“If I moved too slowly, messed something up, or talked back, he’d hit me with the poker straight from the forge,” he said. “You have to work with your sleeves rolled back; otherwise, they can get caught in your work, plus it’s blistering hot, so...”
When he didn’t continue the thought, she concluded it for him. “He branded you by marking each of your mistakes.”
An embittered grin came to his lips. “Good thing hunting took me away for weeks at a time, else I’d have more.”
Ilain’s fingers traced his sleeve. “How many—?”
“I haven’t bothered to count.”
The look on her face was so brokenhearted, so purely sorrowful, that a soft laugh escaped him. “I’m free of him, Ilain,” he reminded her. “I left behind Trollenston and my uncle for good.”
With a heavy sigh, Ilain scooted closer. “I want to ask more,” she whispered. Her green eyes were lined with tears. “But I won’t.”
“Thank you,” he said and brushed his fingers over her jaw. “Now, about that kiss....”
Dry humor spread across her face, and she pulled back. She caught his hand, entwining their fingers. “Actually,” shewhispered with obvious reluctance, “I think your damned sense of ‘reason’ has caught up to me.”
Ethenn frowned.
She squeezed his hand. “We shouldn’t.”
“Because it isn’t what you want?” he asked, lingering close to her, their breath mingling. “Or because it’s irrational?”
“Because,” she said, swallowing back her disappointment, “magic makes you feel out of control. And I don’t want to make this harder on you than it already is.”
Ethenn lifted his chin in understanding. She was letting him back out for his own sake. He’d opened up to her, and she would let him train with Brea. There was no need for any physical distraction that might entangle his heart or stir up his desire.
“Hm,” Ethenn hummed, considering the letdown he felt in his chest.
“Hm?” Ilain hummed back. She was so close, their faces within inches, that he could practically feel the energy of her magic tugging on his in the air around them.
With a singular nod, Ethenn made his decision. He turned to her again, took her face in his hands, and said, “I don’t care about that.”
