Ducking into the trees, Thom found Hewitt exactly where Deckard had said he’d be. The burly man stood in the shadows, looking the same as he always had. It made Thom’s heart swell and break all at once.
“Well?” Hewitt said impatiently. “What did you need?”
Thom smirked. “You never change, do you?”
“Not if I can help it.”
He laughed, then sobered immediately. “I wanted to apologize,” he said. “You were right the other day. I betrayed your trust—and Evie’s and Deckard’s. I was foolish and arrogant, and if I could take it all back...”
Hewitt watched him coldly, his eyes like steel. “You always were too conceited to see past your own nose.” He sighed then. “Just like I was.”
Thom looked up at him, confused.
“I’m the second son, too, remember?” Hewitt said. “I spent my life as the lesser. All you lot like me now, but you didn’t know me back then. It’s a wonder I ever convinced Irena to give me a chance. I was foolhardy, arrogant, and violent. And I made even more mistakes than you in my day.”
Thom shifted on his feet, wondering how that was possible. Since the day he joined the army, all he’d ever heard about General Hewitt Glaas was that he was a military master, a veritable legend. And then he was gone, leaving a gaping hole in the army’s command. Imagining such a man to be a screwup like him....
“What changed?” Thom asked. “If you were really as bad as all that, how did you become...this? How did you stop making mistakes and become a legend?”
Hewitt frowned as though he’d never considered it. “There was a draft,” he said. “I was conscripted, and for once in my life, I had a purpose, somewhere I could put the aggression I felt and turn it into something good.”
Nodding, Thom took in his words.A purpose.He couldn’t say he’d ever felt he had a purpose either. He’d always just lived, never thinking of how he might do more. Deckard had a purpose. Since birth, it seemed that Deckard sought out ways to serve, to be of use to the world around him. All the while, Thom looked for ways that others could serve him.
Perhaps that was the key. If Thom could discover a purpose and a means to impact those around him, he might finally have a chance to become a man of value.
“Could you help me?” Thom asked the ghost. “I want to do that—find my purpose and do something good in this world. But the army didn’t do that for me. Even this mission hasn’t done that for me. And if saving our country isn’t enough to give me that...I don’t know what will.”
Hewitt tugged at his beard. “I can try to help you,” he said. “But in the end, you’re the only one who can answer that question. What is more and what is less toyou? That’s the answer you’ll have to find. Because it’s different for us all.”
The charge was weighty. It felt impossible. If almost twenty-eight years hadn’t given Thom a direction, how was he supposed to suddenly figure it out for himself?
“Can’t you just...tellme what I should do?” Thom asked, knowing the answer.
Hewitt didn’t bother to reply, raising a bushy eyebrow instead.
Thom sighed. “Yeah, I get it.” He gave a sour smile. “Thanks. It’s nice having you around again.”
“I’d say the same, but then I’d be a liar.”
A deep laugh burst from Thom’s core. “You always were a blighter. Don’t know why anyone likes you.”
The smallest grin tugged at the corner of Hewitt’s mouth. “Me neither.”
“All right, old man,” Thom said. “I’ll leave you alone.”
“Thom.”
He stopped in his tracks, turning back.
Hewitt stared at him, something like pride in his gaze. “She chose you too,” he said. “And so did I.”
The comment warmed Thom from the inside out. And he knew it was true. Perhaps Evylin had chosen Deckard as a husband, but she’d chosen Thom as a brother. Perhaps Hewitt had chosen Deckard to care for his girl, but he’d chosen Thom as well, albeit in a different way. The truth was that he’d never been rejected. He’d simply failed to see the value in the role he’d been offered.
Walking back into the camp, Thom’s eyes immediately found Deckard and Evylin sitting together by the fire. They were eating their dinner, lukewarm from their late arrival, both of them smiling as though they weren’t fighting to end a war. Deckard kept putting his slice of bread in Evylin’s bowl, and she kept returning it to him in some secret battle of goodwill.
A pleased smile came to Thom’s lips. Perhaps they were where he’d find his purpose—not in securing a future for himself or in pleasing his own personal designs but in protecting his family. A little over three months ago, Evylin had brought an opportunity into his life: the chance to care for his brother in a way he never had before. If there was one purpose, one goal he could accept without hesitation, it was ensuring the happiness of Deckard and Evylin. He could keep them safe and help secure their future. Their mission was fraught with danger. But Thom would readily accept the role as their protector. He would see them through this, no matter what.
Thom resumed his seat near Rafferty and Brea. While Rafferty was busy chattering to Evylin, Brea sat with her legs crossed, balancing a blade on the tip of her finger, a contemplative expression on her face. Thinking he shouldn’t distract her, Thom turned, intending to join Rafferty’s conversation, but then she spoke.
