“I confronted her, and she admitted it. They had been carrying on for six months. That’s why, after what happened to you and Brian, she pushed for you to leave Rockstead. She couldn’t look at you anymore, knowing what they had done. She says she’s ashamed, but I don’t believe her. I hired an attorney and filed for divorce. I’m really sorry, Kat.”
My heart was thumping rapidly, and nausea swept over me.
“I know how much you loved Brian, but I wanted you to know that he wasn’t the perfect man you thought he was. You never looked through his phone after?—”
“His phone was missing and never found,” I say. “Thank you for letting me know, Mark, but it doesn’t matter. I’m happily married and have a great life. Brian was my past, and that’s where he’s staying.”
“I get it, and I’m happy for you, Kat. Again, I’m sorry to come here and tell you. But you had a right to know.”
I walked him out of my office, said goodbye, and ran to the bathroom and vomited. I grip the sink’s edge and stare at myself in the mirror as a single tear falls from my eye. I thought Cindy was my friend. After Brian was murdered, she took it hard—really hard. I didn’t think much of it at the time because I was grieving. But looking back, she acted like it was her husband who died, and she was the grieving widow. Yet she took me in and let me stay in her guest room. She helped me pack the entirehouse and Brian’s things. She was never my friend. She was just playing the role. I run back into the stall and vomit again.
20
The soundsof screeching tires and crunching metal fill the air as I peer out the window, trying to assess the situation that a massive pile-up is standing between me and my destination. We were trapped in a gridlock of idling cars. Horns were honking, people were throwing their arms out the window, and some were shouting obscenities.
My heart sank when I checked my watch and saw I had only 15 minutes until my appointment with Dr. Burton.
“Is there any way you can navigate around this mess?” I plead with the cab driver.
“Look around, lady. Does it look like I can move an inch?”
Dr. Burton’s office is only two walkable blocks from where we are gridlocked. Pulling some cash from my wallet, I hand it to the driver.
“I’ll get out here. Thank you.”
“Suit yourself,” he says.
I pull my coat tighter, trying to shield myself from the biting wind that whips through the city streets. My heart pounds with nerves and dread as I make my way to Dr. Burton's office. Every few steps, I look over my shoulder, convinced I'm beingfollowed. The wind is fierce today and muffles the bustling sounds of the city. All I can hear are my own footsteps and those of the strangers passing by. Yet, I still look over my shoulder every few steps.
“Thank you for seeing me on such short notice,” I tell Dr. Burton as I take off my coat and sit on the couch.
“You sounded very frantic on the phone. What happened?”
“Do you remember when I first came to see you a few years ago and I told you about my friends Mark and Cindy?”
“Yes. Didn’t they take you into their home after the break-in?” he asks.
“Yes. And Cindy was the one who helped me pack my entire house. Anyway, Mark came to see me today at my office and told me something awful.”
“What did he tell you?”
“That Cindy and Brian were having a six-month affair before he was murdered. After Brian was killed, Cindy told Mark she had lost her phone and needed to get a new one. Mark found her old phone hidden in the back of their closet with pictures of Cindy and Brian in bed together and multiple text messages—some sexting and some I love and miss you.”
“Katherine, I’m sorry. You had no idea that your husband was having an affair?”
“No. None at all. I still can’t believe it. What am I going to do, Dr. Burton?”
“You’re going to have to process your feelings. Listen, Katherine. I know you’re extremely hurt right now over this revelation, which is to be expected. Your feelings are valid. But you have a new life now. You cannot let what happened in your old life affect your new one. You’re happily married and have a rewarding career. Those are the two things you need to focus on, not the past. Your first husband left you alone twice, once in grief and now in betrayal. Do not make it so you’re forced to be aloneagain. Because if you start obsessing over Brian’s affair, it will cause problems with your current husband. So, take some time to process it, go through the stages, then lock it away in the back of your mind and never give it attention again. Do not let what Brian did hold power over you. You’re stronger than that.”
I carefully listen to Dr. Burton and realize he’s right. What hurts the most is how stupid I am for not seeing the signs. Or maybe Brian was just that careful.
“Thank you, Dr. Burton.” I manage a soft smile.
I walk out of his office. The moment my feet hit the pavement outside the building, a feeling rushes over me, and I hit the ground.
21
I can feelsoft fingers stroking my hand. Opening my eyes, I struggle to focus amidst the blinding overhead lights and the pounding that’s going on in my head. Oliver is sitting in a chair by my bedside, holding my hand.
