Jess laughs. I look at Zara and she can’t quite wipe the grin off her face, she keeps glancing at me with her mouth wide open.
‘Follow me.’ We walk up a wooden staircase to the second floor and he opens the door to one of the bedrooms.
This is where it’ll all go wrong, isn’t it?He’ll open the doors to cells. Worse, there might be bunk beds.I walk along the tiled corridor, anxious.
As soon as the door opens, we all stand there like he’s unveiled a painting for the first time. Light floods the place. In the middle is a large double bed, made up with impeccable white sheets. It has a substantial mattress too, thick like good chunky toast. There’s a small desk in the corner with a vase full of sunflowers on top and there are shelves of books above the bed. The breeze catches the white muslin curtains, framing the Juliet balcony that overlooks the swimming pool. It even smells good.
‘Are the rooms all like this?’ Zara asks Ben.
‘Yeah, give me a shout if you need fresh towels. I have loads. You’ll have to share a bathroom I’m afraid. And at night, just close the shutters by dusk so you don’t get attacked by the mozzies. The air conditioning has been recently serviced. But yeah…’
He stands there looking a little apprehensive as he waits for our reactions to his beautiful house that we’re being invited to stay in.With as many towels as we want!What is the catch?If it’s the shared bathroom then I’m fine. But I’m still waiting for this to go desperately wrong.Is there someone hidden in the wardrobe? Maybe it’s haunted. Shit, is this some kind of ghostbusting retreat?
Jess perches on the edge of the bed looking so happy she could cry.
Zara breaks the silence by going over to Ben and giving him a hug. ‘Ben. Young man, this is simply outstanding. What is this place? Seriously? And you’re telling me it’s just us three staying here on our own?’
‘Oh, I’m on-site too. But I’m in a little cottage the other side of the pool,’ he says, pointing outside.
‘So we basically have an on-site chef?’ Zara asks. ‘And you can cook anything?’
‘Well, maybe?’ he says tentatively. ‘I might need some notice if I have to get stuff in.’
‘And is there a tap on the wine?’
‘A tap?’ he asks, confused.
‘I’m asking if I can drink as much wine as I want?’ Zara says.
‘I haven’t thought that far ahead but maybe for your own health, let’s limit you to a bottle a day.’
‘Shared or each?’
‘Each?’ Ben replies, trying to do bad wine maths in his head. ‘I haven’t really planned ahead or given much thought to rules, you know. Like you all seem quite normal and nice, but I guess let’s be nice to each other, don’t smoke in the house?—’
‘And don’t pet the feral cat?’ I add.
Ben holds my gaze for a moment. I guess if he was going to rob, swindle or kidnap me then he would have done it already, so I feel my defences drop slightly.Those are good sheets and you haven’t scrimped on this whole affair.Plus, it looks like Zara’s wine consumption might bankrupt you so maybe I should be a tad more sympathetic.
‘Please don’t. I think she has fleas, possibly mange too, but I can’t get close enough to her to check,’ he says.
I laugh. Not that fleas are a laughing matter but if that’s one of the only rules here, I think I might be able to cope.
‘Can I just take a video of this room to show my husband?’ Jess asks. ‘He gifted me this holiday for my birthday and I want to show him how perfect it is.’
Ben nods as Zara walks through to the other bedrooms and bathroom to inspect them.
‘Do you think you might want to take your trainers off? Relax a little?’ Ben asks me, curious about whether he may have won me over.
‘Perhaps. It’s a very beautiful house. Do you know the history of it?’ I ask. ‘The millstone in the living room and the vaulted passageways suggest it might have been some sort of farmhouse.’
‘I think there are some old photos downstairs that might tell you. I found boxes of old letters and books so they may give you some clues if you’re interested,’ he says. ‘I’m glad the house pleases you.’
‘Why do you say that like an English butler?’ I reply, giggling.
He grins in return. ‘I have no idea. But at least you know now that I really have no clue what I’m doing.’
‘You are doing very well so far, Ben/Lorenzo/Pedro…whatever your name is.’
