‘I dance at baby group every week. My cousin’s wedding a month ago.’
Miguel shakes his head from side to side. ‘You?’ he says, pointing to me.
‘Sometimes to the radio…’ When I’m waiting for a coffee in Starbucks, I might sway.
‘Ben, you dance?’ he asks, turning towards him.
‘All the time, obviously.’
‘You are a liar. We are here to dance. And not like some silly side-step, one-two, one-two,’ he tells us, demonstrating. ‘We go on the sand. We dance like monkeys, like we don’t care who’s looking, we are free, like the night. But first, here…’
We all look as Miguel reaches into his pockets.Shit, is this where he gets out the drugs?I’ve never done drugs. I wouldn’t know whether to swallow, smoke or snort. But before my panic intensifies, he pulls out some mini bottles of alcohol. ‘This is brewed by my friend on the island, it’sHierbas. You only find it on Ibiza.’
I can do shots. He hands out the little bottles until we’re all ready, Jess and Zara looking at me suspiciously.Together, we do this together. ‘¡Salud, my friends!’ he says as we all clink our bottles.
I let the liqueur slide down my throat.Balls. It’s like inhaling some very potent thyme, I feel it burn my eyeballs and the skin at the back of my throat, emitting a strong cough like a dragon.
‘MERCY,’ Zara screams while Jess does the most hilarious gurn I’ve ever seen. They cling on to each other for help.
I shimmy on the spot to let the shot take effect, closing my eyes firmly.What the hell am I doing? Why am I here?But then I open my eyes again and I see Ben beaming at me, his head nodding towards the beach, his hands pumping in time to the music. I smile.
‘Dance?’ he mouths to me.
‘Yeah, why not?’ I say.
16
BEN
I do dance. I dance a lot, mainly because Flo dictates it and she only listens to disco, but it’s kitchen dancing. I sometimes dance when we’ve closed the restaurant for the night and I’m mopping up on my own, but Miguel might have a point. There is something very different about dancing in the sand with about a hundred other people, mostly off their faces on alcohol and illegal substances, and losing control of your limbs. Maybe it’s the low lights, the flashing colours, the taste of saltwater and the fact that half of us aren’t wearing shoes but there’s something to be said for jumping up and down, occasionally singing a lyric and throwing your head up in the air and shouting into the night sky as the Ibizan sun goes down.Did we need tickets for this? Who’s looking after this fire? Who’s arranged this? Who knows?Questions race through my mind but I’m not sure I care about the answers.
‘Ben, what the hell was in thatHierbas?’ Zara asks, draping herself over me.
To be honest, knowing Miguel it could have been anything in that bottle, and I feel weird that we bought it out of the back ofhis friend’s van. A van that also housed two Chihuahuas in coats, a double bass, fairy lights and net curtains. Miguel has sprung a lot of surprises on us today so all bets are off. It was incredibly herby. It may have been liquid weed for all I know. Mushrooms. I did give it a quick sniff but maybe I should have done more. All I know is that I felt that shit in my veins. It felt like superpower juice.
‘I’m not quite sure,’ I tell her. ‘Are you having fun?’
‘WHAT?’ she shouts.
That’s the other thing, it’s very loud here. I can’t hear what anyone’s saying and that adds to the mass delirium. Zara doesn’t care though, she just screams into the air, her hands held to the sky as she runs back to Jess: wonderful Jess who is letting go, waving her arms, using a plastic water bottle as a microphone, her hair swinging around. I smile to see her happiness, to see the colours from the lights bouncing off Jess and Zara in lilacs and pinks.
I lost sight of Miguel a while ago after he became a strange dance sandwich with two men wearing angel wings and knee-high boots. But looking around I spy Chloe on her own, downing a bottle of water and throwing a little on her face. She’s done a good job so far of keeping her distance, of not addressing what happened before, and I can’t tell if that silence is building the wrong sort of tension. I guess I could find out now.Go on, Ben. Be smooth. Do I dance on over? I don’t think I have the hip skills for that. She sees me and waves, so I walk towards her, trying to look as cool as possible among the sea of dancers and partygoers.
‘Hiiiii,’ I say as I finally reach her. ‘It’s very loud!’This is good, Ben. State the bleeding obvious.
‘WHAT?’ she says to me. She leans into me and I can smell the familiar earthy scent ofHierbason her breath; her lips are dangerously warm on my skin.
‘It’s very loud!’ I repeat.
‘It is!’
‘Have you seen the moon?’ I ask.
‘WHAT?’ Chloe replies.
I look at her and she smiles. ‘It’s a full moon,’ I say.
‘WHAT?’ she shouts again.
