“Where are you going?” Eli asked.
I shook my head even though it wasn’t a yes-or-no question.
“You don’t need to be alone right now,” he said.
And then I looked up to him and it felt like I was seeing him from underwater, the surface above me creating waves and distortions.
“I think I do, actually,” I found myself saying.
The worry etched in his brow sank past the waterline, filling me with guilt. “Just for a little while,” I added.
“Where are you going? Leonard’s?”
I hadn’t decided until that exact moment, but of course that’s where I needed to be.
Without a moment to even make sure we were alone, Eli leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of my head. “Keep your phone on you, so I can check on you.”
“Okay,” my lips said. “Okay.”
Chapter Fifty
Leonard’s unit was too quiet. The place where Patrick’s cage had been felt like some sort of wormhole. Patrick being gone was the surest evidence that something was truly wrong and that Leonard wasn’t just out at his writing workshop or the cafeteria.
The plants lining his space seemed to droop even though it had only been one day without his attention. I wished I had a place for them all, despite the fact that I’d murdered enough plants to be a serial killer.
Most items in the apartment were tagged with blue stickers, which indicated they should be packed and stored. Similar-looking red tags saidDestroy and discard.
I found myself gravitating to red-tagged items. It was mostly perishables and junk mail and magazines and a few broken items like a chipped vase.
As I pressed deeper into the apartment, I found that Leonard’s casket had been returned back to his spare room. Since it wore a blue tag, I assumed that meant Leonard had made arrangements for the green funeral he’d pivoted to in the last few months. I’d never met someone in my life so prepared for death, and yet I couldn’t make sense of the devastating shock I felt now that he’d actually died.
Regret stung most of all. I’d been home for two whole weeks and because I was so caught up with Eli and doing everything in my power toavoid Ruby, I had barely seen Leonard. I didn’t even get a chance to find out how he felt about his living funeral, and I’d never be able to share the cryptic notes I’d made on my story.
It struck me then how deeply unfair it was that Leonard still probably had so many movies and television shows that he was looking forward to watching and would now never experience.
I hiccupped a laugh at the thought, which then turned into a fresh round of sobs. Leonard was dead and somehow the thing that wrecked me the most was that he’d never get to see the next seasons ofThe Real Housewives of Salt Lake CityandSister Wives.
My phone—all but forgotten—vibrated in my pocket. When I scrolled through the notifications, I found that I’d missed another call and received six texts—all from Brody.
Whatever he needed from me wasn’t relevant in this moment. There was a time when I couldn’t even let his calls ring more than twice before rushing to answer, but right now, he was so far beyond my concern.
I plopped down on the office chair in the corner of the room, letting the weight of grief hold me in its gravitational pull. Under the desk was a metal filing cabinet with folders all labeled with red stickers.Discard, discard, discard, discard.
Normally, I wouldn’t just start digging through someone else’s paperwork, but Leonard was a meddlesome bastard, so surely he would understand. Encourage me, in fact.
I unhooked the first folder from the metal lining of the drawer and opened it on the desk.
It was a script.
My Mother’s FatherDraft 4
I took out the next folder.
Paid VacationPilot Episode Draft 6
Something in the WaterDraft 2
Working Title:Depressed CheerleadersDraft 6.5
