Set boundaries by developing a framework that allows breathing room to expand knowledge over time.
Understand the law and follow it.
Realize that imperfections are a part of life.
At my going-away-slash-graduation party, they handed me an envelope with the money they’d set aside for my first year’s tuition.
We all make choices, son. Good and bad. All the decisions you make from here on out are on you. You don’t have to explain your choices to anyone, but you do have to live with them. Remember that.
When I found myself in a Costa Rican jail, after I lost my wallet in Paris, while I spent hours without power during a hurricane in Jamaica, during a hike in the rainforest, on a river cruise down the Zambezi River . . . my father’s words played in my head on an endless loop. I didn’t do everything right, but I always found a way out of a bind. Even if that meant donating sperm to earn extra money.
“Asa,” my father called out, pulling me from my thoughts. “We’re waiting.”
I swallowed past a hard lump in my throat. “When I was in a bind financially, I donated genetic material to a sperm bank near Wellspring. The money made it possible to pay off debt and buy equipment for the gym.”
“Oh my God,” Dallas whispered. “Wait, so you’re telling us you went into a room, watched porn on TV, and masturbated in a cup so that you could earn extra money?”
“It wasn’t really like that,” I explained.
Blake grimaced. “Nah, nigga, it was like that. You went into the same room other people used before and after you. Then, you didn’t even think about, I don’t know, doing it in another state. Because now there’s a minion walking around Ann Arbor looking like Dex.”
“Blake,” Dex murmured. “Come on, now.”
She shrugged. “Be so fuckin’ for real, Asa. I told you a long time ago to not do dumb shit. Look at where we are.”
Ignoring her, I looked at my mother. “It was anonymous.”
Ma let out a heavy sigh. “Did you consider the possibility that we would find out like this?”
“Yes, I thought of everything when I signed up.”
“Including some kid finding you on a DNA website in the future?” Duke asked.
Glancing at my brother, I nodded. “And the possibility that they would want to meet me.”
Duke raised a brow. “You’re okay with that?”
“I am.” I shrugged. “Sperm produces offspring. Genes make up the individual person, but blood doesn’t make anyone family.” I looked at Demi. My parents took her in when she was a teenager. She was my sister, regardless of whether we shared the same DNA. “Right?”
Demi nodded. “Right.”
“Donating sperm doesn’t make me a parent. Father, technically. Parent, no.”
Bliss approached me, a soft smile on her face. “I think it’s a beautiful thing. You’re giving a gift to parents who need it. How was it?”
After I’d gone through the process a couple of times, I believed I’d done something important. My balls did something selfless. Plus, my family was top tier. My parents, phenomenal human beings. My siblings, smart as hell. Me?I’m good.
“It was a positive experience,” I told Bliss. “And a part of my past. I haven’t done it in years.”
Ma’s shoulders fell. “I’m not saying I agree with you. But . . . at least you didn’t get some poor girl pregnant and ghost her.”
“Mom?” Blake stomped over to us. “That’s it? You’re not going to cuss him out?”
“Why would we do that?” Dad asked her. “You haven’t done things we agree with. Asa is a grown man, and as long as he didn’t hurt someone, I’m fine.”
“This is some bullshit.”
I frowned. “What, Blake? Tristan was right,” I pointed out. “This doesn’t have anything to do with you. You’re wildin’ out. Lennox been gone for a week and you’re walking around here angry at the world. The light is too dark. The chicken is too cold. The world is too round. What the fuck? Doesn’t Tyn supply you with enough vibrators to calm yo’ ass down. You can’t be fucking that much at your age.”
