We started working in silence again. We’d gotten the last few orders out, closed up for the day, and were cleaning up. Scrubbing and putting things away before we drove the truck out to its overnight spot. I was whistling to some old-school merengue playing on the speakers when I heard someone come up to the back door of the truck.
“Hello?”
I turned around and saw a woman standing by the back of the truck. She was wearing one of those workout outfits people don’t actually workout in, and she was giving me and the truck stank face so intense I got scared she’d melt the paint off the damn thing.
I smiled at her and she just glared back with her arms crossed against her chest. Her blonde ponytail so tight, her eyebrows were flush against her hairline. She was probably in her fifties and had clearly been to the Botox dealer in town.
Oh man…I did not have the energy for any of this. Nothing good could come from this lady seething by my truck like I owed her money.
I stepped down to where she was standing and did my best to look friendly. “I’m sorry, the lunch service is over for today. I can give you our card so you can follow us on Instagram. We update our location and menu every day.”
She did something with her face I think was her attempt at a smile, but it came out more like a grimace. Then she flicked her hand at me, dismissing the information, stretching her neck trying to look past me.
“I’d like to speak to the owner, please.”
Oh, it’s like that, is it?
I extended my hand out to her. “That would be me, Ernesto Vasquez. How can I help you?” I snapped those syllables, too; no diluting my name toEhr-nais-tow Vas-quaystoday.
Nope.ErrrrrrNESTO Vas-QUEZin motherfuckingES-pañol.
She looked at my hand like it would bite her, then stepped back.
“So, are you moving through town or something? I’m with the city council and saw your truck here selling food when I walked by earlier. I just want to make sure everything’s in order.” She tipped her head to the side like she wasn’t sure I could understand her. “That all the documents for your business are in place.”
Whaaaaaat the fuuuuuck?
I tried very hard to control my temper before I answered her. Because this woman at the very least was implying I was running my truck without a permit, or at worst that me, the truck, the food, and the whole fucking rig were here, what? Illegally?
I was about to clarify for her that I was a U.S. citizen if that’s what she was referring to by “documents,” when my mom cameout of the truck. She stopped for a second and seemed to know or at least recognize the woman. Then shestarted walking up to herwith the smile she only gavepeople right before going full-blown, “Bitch, I’m Dominican!” whenever anyone tried to fuck with her kids.
Before my mom got in the lady’s face, and the impending verbal bloodbath unfolded before my eyes, I got my ass in gear, and blocked Mamí’s path with my hand.
“Ma’am, are you a sanitation inspector? Otherwise, I have my permit to operate this truck and my insurance and licenses are in order.”
I pasted a smile on again, and tried to be courteous and polite, to show this rude fucking woman what it meant to behave like a human being. I knew my face was definitely not friendly at this point, but I was done with this. “Like I said, please stop by sometime to try our food. I should get back to cleaning the truck before we drive it out.”
I turned around, grabbed my mom’s hand and left the lady down there looking pissed as we stepped back into the truck.
I hoped this was the end of it, but my brown ass had been around the block enough to know this lady and her meddling would probably be back.
Jude
“Oh my god, Jude Eugenio Maria Fuller! What did you say to him before you walked off? He was blushing and fanning himself!”
I laughed as Carmen and I hurried to the library with our lunch in hand. “Stop giving me random names in Spanish, Carmen! It’s weird!”
“Tell me what you said to the man, Jude!” I shrugged, in answer to her question as we power walked back to the office.
“I may have flirted with him a little.” I blushed at the thought of how bold I’d been. “When he handed me the food he toldme they’d be around all summer and hoped to see me soon. I don’t know but something just came over me. I leaned up to the counter and told him, ‘If I don’t see you first,’in Spanish. He has a very strange effect on me.” Carmen gave me a confused look and I couldn’t blame her; I was confusing myself. “Maybe it was because he gave us extra tostones.You know how much I love them.”
“Riiiiiight,” she drawled. One of her eyebrows was raised so high, I feared it would pop right off her head. “It was because he gave you deep fried plantains. This is great. You need to be a little more spontaneous. If you ask me, you should come back on Friday and ask him out for a drink! He said he wants to see you.”
“Yeah, buying his burritos, not at the bar.”
We walked into the library and headed straight for the break room.
“And I’m spontaneous all the time. I go out with people. I just don’t date-date. I certainly wouldn’t say no to a drink with Nesto,” I said as I pulled food out of the bag.
