I laughed when I was done, “Wow that is so sour and delicious.” I extended the bitten fruit to him in offer. He immediately leaned in, and for a second it seemed like he would take a bite from the fruit in my hands. But at the last second he reconsidered and plucked it out of my hand.
Looking more than a little harried, he brought it to his mouth and took a big bite.
Immediately his eyes bugged out and he turned his head to spit it out.
“Oh my god. That’s crazy sour.”
I did not dare laugh as he gulped water from a bottle he grabbed from his bag. When he was done he took a deep breath and narrowed his eyes at me.
“Were you fucking with me?”
I held up my hands, still holding in a laugh. “No, I reallydidlove those. We almost never took more than one bite out of them though, and never one so big.” I smiled ruefully. “It was a pretty weak contest.”
He cut his eyes at me as we stepped around the palm tree back to the exhibition. “You could’ve told me.” His grumbling was adorable, and I would’ve given almost anything to be able to grab him and kiss that grumpiness out of him.
I dipped my head and tried to sound contrite. “Sorry. Next time we are revisiting my childhood in the Dominican Republic, I will provide disclaimers.”
“You’re not cute.” He scoffed as we walked and again, I felt like being here with him was exactly where I was supposed to be.
All of a sudden he piped up. “Can I ask you something?”
He looked so serious I was almost afraid to say yes, but I nodded.
“Do you see yourself as Dominican?” He gestured at my face, as if presenting me with the evidence. “I mean, you look…white. Your name isThomas Hughes. But it sounds like so much of who you are is tied to your DR roots.”
Damn. He didn’t beat around the bush. Sanjay and Henock waited years before they’d asked me that.
Not Camilo.
“That’s a pretty loaded question, Camilo. Are you sure you want to get to know me this well?”
He dipped his head, those gray eyes certain and locked with mine. “Yes I do.”
“All right,” I said, once again surprised at how eager I was to open myself up to Camilo. “Well the short answer is yes. I don’t just see myself as Dominican, IamDominican. That’s where I was born and lived my entire childhood. I came to the U.S. as an adult. Well, a legal adult anyway. I’m American, too, ofcourse, but I consider myself an immigrant in this country in a lot of ways. When I came to New York City for college—I won a scholarship for Columbia.”
He nodded impressed and mouthed “fancy.”
“Thank you.” His reactions were always so genuine, I felt like I was always just on the cusp of smiling whenever I was around Camilo.
“It was an amazing opportunity, but at first I was lost. I’d only been to the States for visits a few times, and always with my parents. It was so intimidating to come here on my own. Just me and my two suitcases. It was daunting and so lonely. I didn’t know where I fit. In the DR I’d been Dominican like everyone else. Here I looked white and with my name the Latinx students weren’t sure what to make of me. The white students just assumed I was some kid from the suburbs.” I held up my hand then, because I wasn’t trying to imply I didn’t have all kinds of advantages. “Don’t get me wrong. I was very privileged. I’d gone to the international school where my dad taught in the DR, so I was fully bilingual and had a scholarship to one of the most prestigious universities in the world, and through my dad was a U.S. citizen. I was living the Dominican boy dream, but it was still a hard adjustment. College was tough.”
I smiled thinking about Heni and Sanjay, and how meeting them was like finally finding my people.
“I didn’t really come into my own until grad school. There I met my two best friends who ended up becoming my business partners and my U.S. family in many ways. Sanjay’s family emigrated from India when he was a boy; he grew up in the Midwest where his dad was a physics professor. And Heni came here for grad school from Ethiopia.”
Camilo was still intent on me, he’d made affirmative sounds as I spoke, but he hadn’t said a word yet.
“The guys and I had very different backgrounds, but we hit it off from day one and became each other’s support system. Well, and Priya, too. I don’t know what I would have done without them. As for how I negotiate those sides, I’m still figuring it out. I think in many ways I chose the path of least resistance. I just let people assume what they want.”
He seemed to be struggling with the last part or whatever he wanted to say in response. Then he looked up and took a sip from his water.
“Thanks for sharing that.”
I knew he was holding something back, but I didn’t want to push. I had a feeling whatever was floating around in his head was not going to be something I wanted to hear.
“You seem like you have something on your mind?”
I felt like Camilo could see into those parts no one else noticed. I’d always been cautious about who I let in. Depending on the people I was with or the situation, I could be Tom Hughes, successful American businessman or Thomas Caonabo Hughes Gomez, son of Esperanza and grandson of Libertad. Those two people were very different, and they almost always stamped each other out.
