He studies me closely. Too close. “She’s fine. Self-assured. A woman stepping into power. That’s some sexy shit. But I gotta ask… is this just a challenge you’re after? Missing that rush?”
I don’t blow him off. It’s a fair question. Once upon a time, that’s what it might have been. Back when I needed friction to feel something. The chase. The chaos.
Do I still crave that edge? Yeah.
Is she a substitute for it? No.
“It’s not about the rush,” I tell him. “It’s her.”
He waits like there’s supposed to be more. There isn’t.
“She’s not a game. Not a high. When I’m with her, everything just… settles.” I meet his eyes. “I’ve never had that before.”
“She really calm you down like that?”
“Yeah. She’s better than sleep meds or Gogo’s tea.”
He huffs a quiet laugh and squeezes my shoulder. “Then I’m happy for you, bro.”
With that, we fall back into step.
And mine feel a little lighter.
Chapter Twenty
Rayne
DK was giving my man, my man, my man energy.
Water bottle opened, caring on lock, telling me not to make him worry. Boyfriend material. Neo, on the other hand, was giving that bad-boy edge. The kind I would’ve chased in my twenties. Back when I believed swagger meant confidence. When I thought I could teach a man to be emotionally available instead of asking myself why I was drawn to the ones who weren’t.
Growth is humbling.
I keep my word and slip into the cooling station. Instant relief. It’s a quiet oasis from the noise and suffocating heat. I finish my water and check in with my team, making sure they’re rotating, hydrating, and taking rest breaks.
Twenty minutes later, I step back into the thick air. Kids streak past with painted faces. The snow cone line snakes toward the boardwalk. I mingle without campaigning. This isn’t the time or place for policy. Just presence, smiles, and attention.
Near the temporary tattoos, I catch up with Sophia. She’s holding a paper cone and tearing off pieces of pink, fluffy cotton candy. She smiles at me, but it lacks the usual brightness. Though in this heat, even a smile takes effort.
“Where’s the rest of the Beyhive?” I ask about her girl gang of Beyoncé stans.
“I’m meeting up with them later. I was helping C and Lex at the pop-up café. No one wants coffee in this weather, but the iced teas and refreshers are selling.”
“That’s good.” I study her for a second more. “You okay?”
“Yeah. Why?”
“You look a little down. ”
She hesitates. “Do you think I’m too sweet?”
“What? No,” I answer truthfully. “How is that even a thing?”
“Trust me, it is.” She brings another piece of cotton candy to her mouth, then pauses with a wince. “Oh my God, look what I’m eating. Like I’m five.” She tosses the cone into a nearby garbage bin.
“What’s going on?” I tug her gently into a cooling station.
“That’s what that guy Neo called me. Too sweet. He was nice about it. But still.”
