I swallowed hard, still staring at the phone. “He knows.”
“Know what?”
“That I’m leaving.”
“Navy, listen to me. Get your keys and walk out right now. Don’t worry about them bags. Don’t worry about none of that shit, just leave it.”
I looked around the room at everything I had left from my documents I had already pulled from the safe earlier to my grandmother’s ring sitting in the small jewelry box on the dresser. I looked at the bag with my nursing school pictures and the old cards my mama had written me before she passed. People always tell women to just leave, and I got it, because being alive mattered more than stuff, but it’s different when the stuff in front of you is the little pieces of yourself you’re trying to take back.
“I’m not leaving my important stuff,” I scoffed.
“Navy,” she sighed once again. “As smart as you are, I swear sometimes I wonder if you have a brain, but then again, you love him… I don’t. So, I can’t even sit here and act like I don’t know how hard it is to actually leave.”
“Listen, I got a few more things and then I’m gone.”
“You being stubborn as hell right now.”
“I’m being real, if I walk out with nothing, I’m still trapped, just in another way. I need all of my shit.” I told her in all seriousness.
Tasha let out a deep breath of frustration. “Then keep me on the phone.”
I rolled my eyes. “I can’t, I need both hands.”
“Put me in your pocket then heffa.”
“Tasha!”
“Don’t Tasha me. You called me, so now I’m here. You don’t have to let me come get you, but you not about to hang up and have me over here pacing holes in my damn floor. I’m already trying not to roll a fat one and smoke my nerves away.”
I didn’t argue because I didn’t have the energy, and truthfully, hearing her voice was the only thing keeping me fromflipping that whole dresser over. I set the phone down on the bed, still on speaker, and started moving again grabbing the rest of the stuff I needed.
My mind was running through everything at once. The way Rome had smiled at me last week like he wasn’t plotting on keeping me stranded and the way his other bitch had sounded so proud on that phone, like being pregnant by him made her untouchable. I almost wanted to call her back and tell her to ask her baby daddy why he was stealing from a woman he claimed he didn’t need but I wasn’t about to give either one of them the satisfaction of hearing me unravel.
“You still there?” Tasha asked again.
“Yeah girl.” I answered damn near breaking a sweat trying to get everything.
“What you doing?”
“Grabbing everything. I told you that,” I mumbled rolling my eyes.
“Good, get all that shit and go.”
“I know Tasha! Damn, I’m trying to think.” I snapped slightly agitated although she meant well.
“No, you don’t know because you still over there grabbing scrubs and shit like you got all night. Navy, if he know you leaving and he coming back, you need to move like he already at the light down the fucking street.”
That made me move faster because she was right, and I hated when Tasha was right while I was mad. I grabbed my purse, slung it across my body, and reached for the duffel on the bed. It was heavier than I expected, and I cursed under my breath while dragging it toward the bedroom door. My second bag was still open, stuffed halfway with clothes I probably didn’t even need, but I couldn’t make myself leave it yet. I turned back, grabbed the last of my shit, and shoved them down inside.
A new text came through before I could zip it up. The sound made both me and Tasha stop talking. I picked up the phone and opened it, already knowing it was him. ‘Don’t make me come in there and embarrass you.’
I stared at the message with a funky frown on my face. Embarrass me? As if he hadn’t already embarrassed me by having another woman call my phone pregnant. As if he hadn’t embarrassed me by putting his hands on me and then sending flowers to my job like roses could cover bruises. As if he hadn’t embarrassed me every time he made me defend staying with him to the little piece of myself that still knew better.
“Tash,” I said, in a ‘oh shit’ tone.
“What?”
“He just texted me talking about don’t make him come in here and embarrass me.”
