He rubs the back of his neck. “I knew it was out of line, but honestly, I had been looking for an excuse to get in touch, and at the time, it felt like two birds with one stone.” He presses his lips together. “It was… dumb. I know. Especially after the way I ended things with us and then kind of…”
“Disappeared?” I finish for him, stunned to be getting any kind of apology at this point.
“Yeah,” he says heavily. “I know it’s not an excuse, but you were always so… intimidating.”
My eyes bug. “What?”
He shrugs. “It’s true. You know I’ve never strayed from the playbook. Went to school where my parents went. Took the job they set up for me. But you were never afraid to have these huge, creative dreams and make something of yourself. It made me feel… I don’t know. Small, I guess. And sometimes—” His sandy eyebrows come together as he frowns. “Sometimes, it made me want to make you feel even smaller. I hated that about myself, so… I left.”
I swallow hard. If I’d had even an inkling of this two years ago, or enough self-worth to shake off his rejection instead of internalizing it, where would I be now?
Not at Larkwood, a little voice whispers through me.
I shake my head to clear it. “Why are you telling me all of this now?”
He takes a deep breath and looks over his shoulder to where the wedding party is taking selfies across the room. Brooke hasn’t come down from the bridal suite with Sofia yet, but I know he’s thinking of her.
“One thing about Brooke,” he says slowly, “is that she doesn’t mind calling me out. I tried pulling the same crap with her at work, and she wasn’t having it. I think, over time, I started waking up. I’ve wanted to apologize to you for a while now, and I guess today kind of seemed like the last chance to clear the air?”
He says this last bit like he’s asking for permission, and I’m not going to lie—there’s still an itty-bitty part of me that still wants to blame him for my choice to give up on Grace & Veil and go into permanent hiding beneath my Snuggie. But it’s a squeak compared to the much louder part of me that’s finally accepting my own role in all of this.
So, I take a breath and give him a smile that feels like sweet relief as years of baggage drop from my shoulders. “Thanks for saying all of that. I’m more than ready to move on as friends, Cal.”
The surprised grin he gives me is so boyish and genuine, I don’t stop him when he comes in for a hug. “Thanks, Gracie. You were always too good for me.”
“Not true,” I say against his shoulder. “We learned exactly whatwe needed from each other, and no one can ask for more than that.”
He lets out a relieved exhale as someone from across the room calls his name. I gently pry him off me and whisper, “Come on. Let’s go get you hitched.”
The ceremony is perfect. Fluffy white clouds skim across the balmy blue sky, and every rose in the garden is in full bloom. Brooke and Calvin are gorgeous together, even if Brooke’s makeup doesn’tquitecover up the still-healing lump on her forehead.
Standing in the same portico where I once crumpled in Agatha’s arms, it’s incredible to me that I feel so much peace now. I only wish she were here to witness it. Despite all odds, I not only found the closure she wanted for me, but also the love she predicted I’d find where I least expected it.
My stomach fizzes like champagne when I think of Jude, racing back to me. Today, the charade we’ve been playing is finally coming to an end. But for once, I’m not afraid. He’s seen how important Larkwood is to the vendors who rely on it. And while we still might not see eye to eye on the issue of Agatha’s legacy, I’m beginning to believe that I’ve proven to Jude that lovecanbe found. It might be rare and precious, but that only makes it more worthy of celebrating. Hopefully, right here at Larkwood.
At the sudden swell of cheers and whistles, I look up to see Calvin and Brooke, sharing their first kiss as a married couple. My heart is so full for them, and for my own future, too, but my moment of reverie is over.
For the next hour, Phoebe and I move like two coordinated blurs, and in what feels like .3 seconds, it’s time to get everyone to the ballroom for dinner. I’m so busy that I’ve completely forgotten to worry about the cake or even pester Jude until a passing server says to me, “There’s a delivery for you in the kitchen.”
The bolt of nerves that shoots through me is so fast and electric, I’m surprised I don’t leave burns on the parquet floor as I take off. When I reach the door, my stomach is a merry-go-round on warpspeed as I smooth my dress. I’ve never felt so beautiful or more nervous. But somehow, every racing thought and task on my to-do list disappears when I see him.
He’s leaning against the kitchen island in the tux I asked him to wear to “blend in.” But looking at him now, it’s obvious that “blending in” isn’t going to be an option.
My breath catches as I take in the perfect cut of his black jacket, its peak lapels pointing like arrows to how unreasonably broad his shoulders are. Below his black bow tie, the crisp white V of his shirt draws my gaze down his impossibly long body, all the way to where his slutty bare ankles are crossed, one over the other. And suddenly I understand. If I could afford to dress him like this every day, I would. I’d go bankrupt just to see him like this again and again.
“Baby,” he whispers, his voice perforated as a shooting target as he slowly straightens from the island.
My eyes jump to his, and I’m swallowed by his gaze in one famished gulp.
“It fits,” I say pointlessly. Then, flushing a little, “Everything fits.”
He nods, throat moving in a swallow. “Will you turn for me?” he asks.
I nod, stomach clenching. When I start to rotate, he says, “Slower.”
My breathing ticks up as I hear him cross the room. When I’m faced away from him, I feel the whisper of his touch at my bare nape. Slowly, a single fingertip trails down my completely exposed spine, and goose bumps rise like every inch of my skin is calling out for his attention.
His lips brush my ear as my eyes flutter shut, nipples tightening to an ache. “Jesus, Gracie. How am I supposed to do anything but need you right now?”
