The question catches me off guard. He didn't ask this for the others.
"I—"
"When did you last lie with him?"
"Recently—“
"Within the week?"
God. "Yes."
"Within days?"
Fuck. “Yes.”
"Did you, by means of your body, entice him to profess his love to you and abandon his sacred vow?”
For some reason, this last time breaks me.
"It wasn't—" I'm crying now, sudden tears hot on my cheeks. “I didn’tenticeanyone. He wanted me. They all did. It wasn’t?—”
“Did you takepleasurein thus being desired by four men who had sworn themselves to God?”
“I…” I can’t finish a sentence. Can’t finish a thought.
"Speak."
"Yes." It rips out of me. "Yes, I enjoyed it. Yes, I wanted them. All of them. Is that what you want to hear?"
The prior does not move. “The truth is all we require. Now.” He looks down at his paper. Looks up at the assembly of Brothers. Looks back at me.
A long moment passes.
What is happening?I think, pulse hammering and tears abated.
"Now," he says again. “She will speak the formal confession.” He pauses. “Repetez.Repeat. I confess before God and this holy assembly?—"
I swallow, jumping in a beat late. “I confess before God and this holy assembly?—"
"—that I am the whore who corrupted Kingston Pendragon, Knight of the Black Table, sworn in celibacy to God."
I wince.
"—that I am the whore who corrupted Kingston Pendragon, Knight of the Black Table, sworn in celibacy to God."
The words taste like ash. Like bile. Like death. And it unfolds like a dream. Like something happening to someone else, wordssaid by someone else, a scene I am watching from high up and far away.
I am the whore who corrupted Kai Pendragon.
Who corrupted Callahan Thomas O’Brian.
Who corrupted Lanzelin Dell’Acqua.
I am the whore who delights in the pleasure of my flesh.
I confess that I am a wanton and insatiable creature, undeserving of mercy.
For even as woman deceiveth man, my sin is the greater, for I confess that I did willfully lead men of God from the path of righteousness as an ox goeth to the slaughter.
