“Goddammit,” Kai cries. Wails, almost. “Goddammit.”
He maneuvers her to the ground, lays her flat on the sand, and falls to his hands and knees beside her.
“Is she—” Lanz rushes forward, but Kai snaps up, eyes bright and vicious.
“I know fuckin’ CPR,” he snarls. “Do you?” Lanz shakes his head. “Then get thefuckaway from me.”
I remember to move. I step forward, grabbing Lanz by the shoulder
“Go,” I say to Lanz, nodding at Cal, who’s shivering violently, breath steaming as water drips off of him. “Get him inside and warmed up.”
“But—” Lanz’s face contorts, like it’s causing him physical pain to leave Gwenna behind.
“Go!” I bark. “You want Cal to die too? We’ve got her.”
Lanz squints, teeth clenched, and I feel the briefest flicker of irritation—that he’s actingsohurt, pulling focus when two others are genuinely, seriously in danger—but he nods.
And then all I can see is Gwenna.
And…Kai.
Hand flat on hand, compressing her chest.
No. Please.My mind is screaming and yet my body is frozen, gone colder than the night is cold.
“Come on,” I hear him say. “Come thefuckon.”
Somehow, I fall to my knees, scramble for them in the sand as Kai counts compressions, holds her face and breathes into her. Counts, breathes. Counts, breathes.
I do nothing—cando nothing, nothing but watch, hope, pray, if God even listens to someone like me anymore.
“Please.” Kai’s voice is a rasp. He pumps his flat hands against her again, knuckles white from the cold, and for a split second, he looks up. At me.
His eyes are wide. Flooded. Raw.
This is not the Kai who smirks or swears or scoffs.
This is someone I have never met.
Again, he leans over, seals his mouth over hers, breathes, and this time?—
Kai rockets back on his knees as Gwenna’s body seizes violently. She burbles, more water escaping her throat. Shegasps.
Alive.
My legs almost give with relief, the tension unconsciously gripping my muscles gone slack. She’s okay. She’s alive, she’s alive, thank Christ. I look to Kai, waiting for it. Waiting for himto fire hisI told you soat me. Waiting for him to wink at Gwenna and coyly ask “Miss me?”
I wait for something. Anything.
Nothing comes.
He’s just breathing. Staring ather,breathing.
Then he sees me staring, and the moment implodes.
In one swift motion, he scoops her up, coat and all, and storms for Camlann.
I stumble getting up. The ground is like granite under my feet as I charge up the hill after them.
