Oh yeah, she had it bad. As she twisted to get him out of her vision, the darned envelope from work crinkled in her pants’ pocket. Why had she brought it along? It wasn’t like she’d read it in public.
She forced thoughts of big decisions away and focused on enjoying the task at hand. She always enjoyed charity work. Having Owen within eyesight and occasionally within touching distance just made it better, and worse.
Finally, she couldn’t stand not talking to him for a second longer. When he headed toward the snack table, she casually strolled after him.
“Owen, hi. How are you this morning?” she asked, pouring herself a hot cocoa. The brush of his sleeve against hers sent shivers up her arm. He smelled incredible, like spice and the outdoors. She resisted the urge to move closer and touch the back of his hand. She distracted her hands by grabbing a cookie and clutching her drink.
“Good morning, Amaryllis.”
The sweet warmth of his voice washed over her like a soothing balm. He didn’t sound mad at her. Thank heaven. She turned to look at him and was instantly lost in the deep blue pools of his eyes. Tiny smile lines crinkled the corners of his sparkling eyes. Wherever he went last night, he’d shed his anger. Hope for a future surged through her.
They stood staring at each other until someone behind them cleared their throat. Heat flooded her cheeks. “I’m just going over there,” she waved her cookie toward some nearby tables sending crumbs flying, “to have a break. Want to join me?”Please, please, please.
“Sure.” They sat for a moment, just looking at each other.
“I missed you last night,” she confessed, wanting him to know she’d been thinking about him. “It was weird to be alone.”
“You could have spent the evening with the guests.” He smirked.
“Tease. I didn’t miss having company, I missed you.” She dropped her voice so the people nearby couldn’t hear. “I like spending time with you, Owen. You’re important to me. Very important.” She didn’t know how to put it more simply.
“Um. Thanks?” He winked. “Honestly, I missed you as well.” He brushed a kiss across her cheek. “You’re important to me too.” He reached out and squeezed her hand in his.
She had the impression there was more he wanted to say. He opened his mouth, snapped it shut, and looked around. At that second, she wished she was a mind reader. She’d give anything to know what was happening inside his head.
“We need to talk,” she said after mustering up her bravery.
“Weneedto talk, or we need totalk?” There wasn’t a hint of joking in his eyes, or his voice, and a frown pinched his brows together. “Have you opened your letter yet?”
She wanted to say yes, but her innate honesty wouldn’t let her. “Not yet. I’d like you to be there when I open it. Please.”
Several expressions crossed his face. Frustration, doubt, anger, and maybe a hint of a smile. “My being there won’t change the contents, you know.”
She nodded, knowing there wasn’t really a proper answer.
“You still have to decide what you want from your life.” He dropped her hand and chugged several mouthfuls of coffee.
Okay, he was nervous too. That was good, right? The tension in her shoulders loosened, even as butterflies held a rave in her stomach.
“I know that I have a lot to think about,” she replied. “My life is on the cusp of change. I feel like I’m teetering on a cliff, and no matter which way I move, no matter what I decide to do, I’m going to plummet into the abyss.” It was much more complicated than that, but she left the statement stand.
“I get it. Life decisions aren’t easy. Leaving the military was tough. Picking myself up after Kiya and the baby died was brutal. But one thing I knew all along was that my family and friends would be there whatever I decided. The people who love you support your decisions, no matter what.”
“I know that. Auntie O will always be there for me. As will my friends.” She put a subtle emphasis on the word hoping he’d know she included him in her friends. “I might lose my job, I might not. Either way, I have options.”
He stood, swilled the rest of his coffee, and walked away. “I’ll see you at the inn later,” he tossed over his shoulder with a smile.
She stared as he strode across the room. Had they reached an agreement? Were they okay? Were they an item? She had no idea. None at all. The only thing their brief conversation had accomplished was to reaffirm that she needed him in her life, wherever she ended up. Now she just had to figure out how to accomplish that.
