I wasn’t seeing her day in, day out, letting her happiness fill my veins like liquid sunshine. Not listening to her laughter like other people listen to symphonies, entranced and longing for more. Not witnessing her at her best and worst, knowing I wanted her any which way I could get her.
“Have you ever?” she presses. “Been in love?”
I gaze down at her, the truth sitting on my chest like a tangible thing.
“No.” Lies and deception.
She inhales slowly as if she might say something, then busts out a smile. “Show me how this works.”
I instruct her on the basics of the rod and reel, pointing out the lures I attached.
“Thank you for not making me stick a worm on a hook.” She moves closer to the riverbank but stops short. “There aren’t sturgeon in here, are there?”
“Not in here. You’re most likely to get a rainbow trout.”
“I guess those aren’t as horrible.”
“Some think they’re beautiful.”
She wrinkles her nose. “Beautiful fish, huh? I’ve got some stiff competition.”
Never any competition for her. She’s already won all the battles, and my heart’s laid down in surrender.
Her sneakers sink in the wet riverbank as she nears the edge. Sunlight turns the water a pale moss shade here, darkening to an opaque blue-green the deeper it gets. The river talks to us on the gentle current, babbling and gurgling over rocks and through scrub brush. Beyond the river, pine trees rise up into the bright blue sky. My favorite place, made even better for having Rose in it.
She gazes back at me. “How do I…?”
I move closer until I’m right behind her, resting my hand over hers holding the rod, the other at her hip. My face is next to her ear, and it’s all I can do not to drop a kiss there. “Is this okay?”
“Yes.” Barely a breath.
“Here’s the motion you want to do.” I take control, lifting the rod and swinging in a wide arc. “It’s a gentle snap of the wrist. Got that?”
Her hand clenches beneath mine. “Do it again.”
I smile to myself, doing as instructed. “There’s an extra step to it.” I show her how to open the reel and hold the line until she’s ready to release. “You’ve got it this time.”
Using every last ounce of my strength, I step away and let her cast. She swings the rod in a fluid motion, sending the bobber into the middle of the river. It drifts downstream, and I help her lock the reel back in place.
“Excellent work, firefly.”
She grins at me. “It’s not so bad.”
“Not bad at all.” Rose beaming with a line in the river might be the most glorious thing I’ve seen in my life. “Now you slowly reel it in and do it all over again.”
I could grab the other rod and move downstream so our lines won’t get tangled. But I sit on the rough log and watch her fish. It’s been a long time since I fished with anyone. Not since Harry passed. My brothers have offered, but like most of my time out here, I thought I deserved the isolation. I’d forgotten how enjoyable it can be with someone else. I’m starting to realize that’s true of a lot of things.
“This is kind of fun.”
I can’t even be annoyed at how surprised she sounds. I did ambush her with it.
“Do you really think we’ll catch something?”
“Fishing is mostly about being on the river and working on your patience.” A virtue I’m running slim on just now.
She reels her line back in, glancing over her shoulder at me like she’s waiting for more instructions. I nod her along. She’s got it. She does everything I showed her, casting the lure back into the river in a gentle arc. A natural.
“For the record,” she says, gaze on the bobber, “I’ve never been in love before, either.”
