Another glance up at her husband, and he appeared nonplused. Not at all concerned about how she was behaving. And that hurt more than anything.
“I should have informed you earlier, but I won’t be able to join you for supper.”
“That is fine.”
“Not that it matters,” he laughed. “Seems you got started without me.”
“I was hungry.”
“And I would hate to stand between you and your stomach,” he quipped. “Also, I wish to confirm tomorrow. I assume nothing has changed?”
Helena frowned down at her plate. “Tomorrow?”
“The promenade. I hate to force you to do anything you do not wish to do, but we made plans, remember? I hope you are still eager.”
Helena grimaced, the sickness inside of her growing so that it consumed her where she sat. She wanted to sink into her seat and vanish from sight.
She also wanted to glare at him, to snap and snarl, to tell him that she was not to be used like this. That if he wanted them to attend public events together, the least he could do was treat her as if she was not some expendable tool that he cared less for than a worn-through shirt.
But she held her tongue, as hard as that was to do.
Was this not always the plan? A marriage of convenience only, with no emotional attachment, no feelings, two strangers living together for the sole purpose of tricking their peers into believing the lie they themselves had created.
Sure, Helena had lost track of herself. She had forgotten why she hated marriage and what she wanted from this life. She had allowed herself to believe that maybe, just maybe, she and Sebastian could be more than what they had started.
I was even beginning to wonder if, from this arrangement, love might… if he and I would… if a world existed in which we could be happy.
This was never about happiness. It was about Helena’s reputation being saved, just as it was about Sebastian’s pledge to save the orphans. That was what she focused on, knowing that as much as she wanted to expose Sebastian and abuse him, she could not.
Better that they carry on as they were and then go their separate ways once it was all done.
“Oh yes, I nearly forgot.” She forced a smile and looked at him. “Tomorrow. I am very much looking forward to it.”
He smiled back, and it was warm and loving and so very false. “Glad to hear it. Enjoy your supper, Helena. I will see you on the morrow.”
“As I will see you.” She fluttered her eyelashes, held the smile, and did her best not to let him see how much she loathed him.
It seemed to have worked. He nodded once, his smile still warm and loving, before he turned and strode out of the room. And she watched him go, her heart breaking, her world collapsing, her resolve weakened such that a light breeze would make it shatter.
This was not the outcome that she wanted, but it was the best she was going to get. Best that she see it through, do nothing to cause alarm or distress, and be glad when it was all over.
Not a happy ending by any means. But an ending, nonetheless. And who knows, one day it might make for a decent story. Better that than nothing.
“It is a glorious day,” Sebastian crooned. “Perfect weather.”
“We have been blessed.”
“It looks as if half the ton is out for it,” he continued merrily.
“They would be fools not to take advantage.”
“Good for us too,” he made sure to add. “I would hate to waste a day like this one. We might as well have stayed home.”
“A good thing there is no need,” Helena said simply. “What is the point if nobody sees us?”
She offered him an exaggerated smile, one that might have been taken for humor.
Sebastian grinned and shook his head, making sure to squeeze her hand tight so that even if she had wanted to, she would not be able to escape.
