Eleanor waslaughing.
Her eyes were squeezed shut, her lips stretching in a smile, and her head shook back and forth while her entire body vibrated with giggling fits. Shifting to see her better, I planted my palms on the carpet so I could hover over her.
“Sorry,” she laughed, attempting to open her eyes, wiping at the tears streaming out of them. “It’s not—it’s just—yourfacesin that picture.”
Her previously silent laughter became something loud and untethered, and I cracked a smile just from the sight of her. God, she was gorgeous. I wanted to taste that smile, wanted to capture those giggles in my mouth, wanted to kiss her until she was breathless and made joyful, wonderful sounds because of the way my lips explored her. I wanted it so fucking bad.
So bad that I nearly forgot that her laughter was obviously at my expense. Not that Ireallycared, though.
Glancing to the side of her head, I examined the pictures I’dslipped from her hands, and when my eyes landed on the first one, it all made sense.
“In your matching little shirts,” Ellie squealed, squeezing her eyes shut again—like she was trying to fight against her tears. “Iforgotabout those. You all look so pissed.”
Despite my smile, I rolled my eyes, flicking the picture of Noah, Blake, Theo, and me across my bedroom floor so Ellie wouldn’t see it and fall into another fit of laughter. We were teens and preteens in the picture, looking particularly disgruntled because, just like every year, my mom had forced us to wear matching T-shirts to the state fair. I wasn’t sure how Natalie had gotten off the hook, but she was nowhere to be seen.
“Well,that’sgoing in the trash,” I muttered. “Don’t know how that got mixed in there.”
“No. Don’t.” Ellie’s eyes flashed open as she fought to catch her breath between bouts of laughter. “Please.”
I sighed.
I didn’t know how tonotdo something when Eleanor begged, which was honestly a problem.
“Fine.”
My eyes drifted to the other pictures lying beside her strands of dark hair, and she turned her head, following my gaze. And that was how we both came to be staring at a picture of us from a decade ago.
Me, in the first suit I’d ever worn. Her, in a short lilac dress. I was a freshman. She was a sophomore. We stood in front of my mom’s rosebushes.
“Our first Homecoming,” Ellie said. She was no longer smiling, not really. But smile lines still outlined her pretty, delicate mouth from her laughing fit, and a rosy hue covered her complexion, brightening her expression.
And maybe it was the soft tone of her voice or just the fact that she was here again, lying on my bedroom floor, but I found myself admitting, “Best night ofmy life.”
“Really?”
She turned, blinking up at me, and it was then that I realized I still hovered over her. My arms and legs were braced on either side of her slight frame, caging her in. But she didn’t entirely seem like she minded. Her hair fanned out across the floor, and her dark, wet lashes sparkled as she gave me a curious look, our eyes connecting.
I found myself wishing we could stay in this moment forever. Ellie felt real, tangible again. Unlike the night in Boston when she’d been on her back, just like this, and I’d been inside her but couldn’t find her.
Maybe she was remembering it, or maybe she was realizing the intent in my gaze, but I could have sworn her breath hiccuped.
“I mean, it was one of them,” I said honestly, answering her question. “Unfortunately for me, all the best nights of my life were with you.”
“Sawyer…” My name left her lips in a puff of air, barely audible, but I was just happy to hear her say it. The right one. Even if it did sound a bit like she was pitying me. “What about, I don’t know, college graduation?”
I shrugged. “Just a piece of paper.”
“No, it wasn’t,” she argued, but I hadn’t cared about my college graduation. By the time senior year rolled around, I’d come to despise my classes, my program, everything. Began hating school all over again.
“You know…I watched,” she said, and I felt my body lower—inch toward her—as though it would help me understand what she was saying better.
“What?”
“I watched your college graduation. On a grainy livestream.”
Fuck.
I searched her face for some indication that she was telling the truth. My heart thudded in my chest, achy and annoying, while Ellie stared back, seeming determined not to shy away frommy probing gaze. She fluttered her damp lashes, but she always returned to my eyes, letting me see her.
