“You just missed an easy pass.”
“I said I’m fine.”
He doesn’t push it. Not then. But after practice, when the locker room has mostly cleared out and I’m sitting in my stall staring at nothing, he drops onto the bench beside me.
“What’s going on with you?”
“Nothing.”
“Bullshit.”
I don’t respond. Don’t look at him.
“You were somewhere else out there,” Zayden continues. “I’ve never seen you play like that. Not even when your shoulder was messed up.”
“Bad day.”
“This isn’t a bad day. This is something else.” He waits. When I don’t elaborate, he sighs. “Look, I’m not going to force you to talk. But whatever it is, you don’t have to deal with it alone.”
Alone. That’s the only way I know how to deal with things. Anything else would be completely foreign.
“I’m fine,” I say again. “Just tired.”
Zayden doesn’t believe me. I can see it in hisface. But he’s a good enough friend not to push.
“Okay,” he says, standing up. “But if you change your mind, I’m here for you, bud.”
He leaves. I sit there for a long time, the silence of the empty locker room pressing in on me.
I should tell someone. Zayden. Winnie. Anyone.
But what would I say?Hey, I might be getting traded across the country, and I don’t know what that means for us, assuming there even is an us, which we’ve never actually established.
It sounds pathetic even in my head.
Besides, what’s the point of worrying her when nothing’s certain? The trade might not happen. The Knights might come around. Everything might be fine.
Or everything might fall apart.
Either way, it’s out of my hands. Just like Rick said.
That night, I lie in bed and stare at my phone.
Winnie and I have been texting every night. Just small things—how was your day, did you eat, what are you watching. The kind of mundane communication that shouldn’t mean anything but somehow means everything.
Her last message came in an hour ago.
Winnie:Long day. My feet hurt, and I think I’m getting a cold. But I keep thinking about your birthday and smiling like an idiot. Is that weird?
It’s not weird. I’ve been doing the same thing.
I start typing a response.
Me:I need to tell you something
I stare at the words. Delete them.
Me:There’s something going on with my contract
