And one guy who was very clearly racist [‘only into non-tanned, non-ethnic women, ’]. Note to self: read profiles thoroughly before swiping
I sighed and swiped right through the twenty-eight men who had attempted to match with me, then switched over to the main app. I glanced through today’s line-up of available men, questioning whether my standards were simply too high.In my head I breezed through my list of what I wanted in my perfect man:
A man
Live/grew up in London
Preferably South London
At least six foot two
No preference on weight or build
Nice teeth and lips
Nice eyes
Well spoken
Tattoos
Educated [university level and beyond]
University must be one of the top 20 best universities in the UK
Earning at least £50k a year
A stable, steady job that isn’t so demanding that it takes time away from moi
Should either have hair, or be completely bald with a full/long beard
Dick size at least six inches and thick in girth; preferably circumcised
Kind, generous, sensitive, fun blah blah blah
Must have own car and live alone. No flatmates
No red pill/Alpha male beliefs
Must ABSOLUTELY NOT listen to any male podcasts
Must not be a super active user of Facebook or Instagram
Must not have more Instagram followers than me
Must not be any kind of social media influencer
Non-cigarette smoker [weed OK on occasion]
Must not invest in or have anything to do with Crypto currency or ‘stocks’
Should be open to pets (especially cats)
I reckoned my list was pretty reasonable, to say the least. I was aware that I had slightly high standards, but it was only because I’ve always wanted the best for myself as someone who consistently brings a lot to the table. Having the man I deserve, is what I deserved; whether I was going to find him on these apps, however, was a different story altogether.
