Maggie slumped in my arms.
Shit.Shitshitshit!
“Max, you gotta wake up. You gotta look at me.”
I set her down on the leather bench by the wall, wrapped a towel around her shoulders, and steadied her.
“Just let me go,” she said, her voice weak and barely there.
My vision blurred when I saw the knife in her hand. And just like that, something snapped inside.
“You want out, princess?” I asked through clenched teeth, grabbing her chin, lifting it so her red-rimmed and hazy as fuck eyes met mine. “That’s not gonna happen. It’s a cop-out. You’re not me. You don’t run from your problems. You’re stronger than that. You end it? You end me too.”
Dropping to my knees, I faced away from her and grabbed the hand with the knife and brought the blade to my throat.
She straightened, gasping as the cold steel raked over my stubble. Her hand trembled under mine until she loosened her grip. I held my hand still tight on hers.
“If you’re taking the easy way out, you’re taking me with you. I didn’t come back just to watch you give up.”
“Graham, I’ve ruined so many lives,” she said, voice trembling, tears welling—threatening to spill over her lashes.
“Yeah, and that’s some serious fucked up shit,” I said.
Maggie held her emotions in until they spilled. “And like what you did wasn’t?”
“No, Max. It was. It’s just… don’t do that. I can’t stand the thought of you in pain like that… bleeding… begging for death.” I took the knife from her shaking hand and set it on the floor beside me then turned around. “Look at me, princess. We’re in this together now.” I locked her gaze with mine. “Do you understand? We have a problem? Wefixit. No more of this. Never.” Then I rose to my feet and took her face in my hands. I didn’t look away until the tears finally fell—caught them with my thumbs before they made it past her cheekbones. “Maggie, I see so much of that with my job… I can’t?—”
“So just because you chose a career that thrusts you into the middle of the darkest parts of people… it automatically means anyone in your life can’t break down—be human? Fuck up? Or is it only you that gets to suffer? Is it only you that gets to experience real pain?
“Jesus Christ, Max.”
“No, Graham. I feel like I’m nothing to you. You left me. How am I supposed to forget that? How am I supposed to trust that when shit gets real again… you won’t leave again.”
“I don’t know. Bind me to you. I don’t care. Spell me. Make it so Ican’tleave. Because I don’t want to. I never want to leave you again. You’ll just have to trust me.”
“I can’t.”
“Well, cupcake, that’s something you’re just going to have to work out… because I’m not going anywhere.”
It was there in her eyes. The embarrassment. The shame. “There’s something else.”
“What is it?”
“Everyone sees me as a commodity—even you. Andthatfucking sucks. I’m only wanted for my body or my psychic abilities—if you can even call them that. At what point does everything stop being a transaction?”
I sighed. “Max, I’m sorry. I never meant it to be like that or make you feel used.”
“Well, you did. Hunter did. Even Derek and Uncle Silas did. The only one who just wants to be my friend is Katie. But I don’t deserve herfriendship. All I do is neglect or reject her. All I do is hurt people. Sometimes I wonder if it would be better for everyone if I just gave up.”
“No.” My voice dropped low—serious. I didn’t even recognize it for a moment—the shards of glass grinding into the grit, trying to unearth everything I wanted to bury. The shit she already knew about. The shit I couldn’t swallow down because this stung too close to my heart.“No shortcuts, princess,” I gritted out. “Never like this. You hurt yourself again… you might as well stab me in the heart and watch me bleed out because I sure as hell ain’t watching you.”
Maggie let her face fall into her hands, and she broke. Sobbing, unable to keep herself together. “I’m so sorry, Graham.”
I sat beside her and wrapped my arms around her. Just held her while she crumbled and the pieces shattered around us.
Her falling into me when I didn’t have the slightest clue what I was doing scared the fuck out of me. But I didn’t care—I couldn’t let her see that.
I pressed a kiss on the top of her head. Like maybe it would do something to stabilize her. Like maybe it would magically fix this. “Don’t worry about it. It’s over now. I’m here. Anytime you get thoughts like that—like you just can’t handle another moment, you call me… text me… anything… any time. Got it?”
