I grimaced. "Fuck no. I would have pulled his dick off if he brought it anywhere near me." Not that I wanted to touch his dick, but it'd be worth it.
"What then?" Forrest asked in a voice that suggested, if I didn't tell him what was on my mind, he'd find a way to force it out of me.
I let out a long, slow breath.
"He told me to fuck Sable," I said reluctantly. "He thought because I said I hated her that I'd have fun forcing myself on her."
Forrest looked disgusted, but not at me. His anger was all aimed at the senator, exactly where most of it should be aimed. Most, but not all.
"That sounds like something he'd do," Forrest said. "What did he say when you refused?"
I cleared my throat and scratched my forehead.
"Woody," he insisted.
"I didn't refuse, okay," I said finally. "I fucked her. He watched. I didn't hate it. Neither did she," I added quickly. "She hated him watching, but I didn't force her."
For a moment I thought he was going to punch my lights out. Instead, he scrubbed a hand over his chin.
"The senator watched you fuck our woman."
"Yeah. Then I poked his eyes out," I said. "It seemed appropriate since he saw her, you know, naked."
Forrest swore softly. "Very fucking appropriate. Why am I only hearing about this now?"
"Because it's not easy to talk about," I said. "I wanted to put it behind me. Sable does too." I didn't want to talk for her, but I wasn't wrong. "I figured you should know what went on. She and I, we didn't walk away from it unscathed. We walked away from it a little bit more fucked up than before."
Yeah, I know, that was saying something, because both of us were fucked up from our pasts. Most of it was because of my father. The more I learned about him, the more I discovered he was much worse than I ever thought. If she had killed him, I would have given her a fucking medal, not tried to kill her.
I couldn't claim to have always made good choices. Thank fuck I hadn't followed through on that, or things would have been very different.
"It can't have been easy for either of you," Forrest said finally. "Both of you were forced to do something you didn't want to do." He hesitated for a moment before saying, "You didn't want to do it, right?"
I thought about being offended at the question, but if the tables were turned, I'd be asking the same thing. Probably sooner than he had too. It would have been the first thing on my mind.
"Not in front of that prick, no," I said quickly. "The whole thing was…ugly as fuck. I can't stop thinking about it. I promised her I wouldn't fuck her until I was worthy of her. And then… Then I did it anyway." I rubbed a hand over the back of my neck, dragging my nails across the skin, a small way of punishing myself.
"Let me guess. She said you were worthy of her," he asked.
"Of course she did, but I don't buy it," I admitted. "I'm not backing down from her. I'm not going anywhere, but I still think she deserves better than me." Chances were I'd think that for the rest of our lives, no matter what she, or anyone else, had to say about it.
He clapped me on the shoulder. "She deserves better than all of us, but none of us is walking away. She loves you, you know. She might not be ready to admit that to herself yet, but she does."
"She loves you too," I said. I'd seen that in her eyes.
"Yes, she does," the bastard actually said, looking smug. "All the more reason for us to keep her safe and keep each other safe."
"Yeah," I said gruffly. "Let's go and get some of that fish of yours." And keep a really close eye on everyone around us.
I'd say anyone who looks suspicious, but right now, everyone was going to look suspicious, including us. All right, go on, say it,especiallyus. No lies detected here.
"Woody," he said before I could step away. "Don't be too hard on yourself, okay? What happened, happened. You didn't have a choice."
"I know." I shrugged. "Thanks."
He nodded. I felt his eyes on my back as I headed down the narrow corridor.
CHAPTER 9
