“You didn’t fail her,” she whispers.
I close my eyes.
Because that hurts.
Because it helps.
Because she shouldn’t say things that make me able to breathe again.
I look at her, and the warmth in her eyes, the softness, the way she’s seeing me nearly buckles my knees.
This is exactly why I can’t do this, why being around her is dangerous in ways I don’t trust myself to manage. It’s too easy to forget the rules I’ve built, too easy to want things I can’t have, to picture a life I don’t deserve after everything that’s already been taken.
I step back, just enough that her hand slips away.
Her face flickers with disappointment, confusion, and hurt, but she hides it fast.
“I should get back,” I say, roughly. “Mom’ll think I fell into a snowdrift.”
“Of course.” Her smile is small. Fragile. “Thanks for walking with me.”
“Thank you,” I say. “For… talking.”
She nods. “Yeah.”
I turn, but her voice stops me.
“Dallas?”
I look back.
She stands there, eyes soft and uncertain and wanting. A fist squeezing around my heart.
“Take care of yourself,” she says. “Not just Lila. You.”
My breath stumbles.
Damn, she shouldn’t look at me like that.
“Yeah,” I manage. “You too.”
I force myself to turn away.
Force myself to walk.
I don’t look back.
Because if I do, I’ll stay.
I know it.
Every cell in my body knows it.
And I can’t stay.
Not when wanting her again leaves me standing on the edge of a wildfire I won’t survive.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
