But also this little spark of… hope?
I hated that word.
Hope had gotten me hurt more times than I could count.
Still, when my phone buzzed and I looked down, saw his name lightin’ up the screen.
Roman:You good?
I couldn’t pretend my heart didn’t do that stupid little flip.
I typed back before I could overthink it.
Me:Yeah.
Me:Just at brunch with the girls.
Roman:Aight. Enjoy yourself.
Roman:Text me when you on your way back.
Charlee peeked over. “Mhm. ‘We not a thing’ my ass.”
“Mind your business,” I said, but I was smilin’.
‘Cause maybe I wasn’t ready to call it what it was.
Maybe I still needed time to trust that this wasn’t just another crash in slow motion.
But sittin’ at that table, watchin’ my friends step into new versions of they selves, I knew one thing for sure:
Whether I liked it or not, Roman Blake was already tangled up in whatever my next chapter was about to be.
And no matter how loud I tried to swear we weren’t a thing…
Everybody around me… including my own heart, was startin’ to call bullshit.
My life had a lot going on as always and truthfully I wasn’t in the mood for shit.
I’d been movin’ quiet the last couple days. Not ‘cause I ain’t have shit to do, but because my head was too full.
Mo birthday had slid up on me.
I’d been so focused on her death date comin’ up, lowkey dreading the anniversary of that night, that I ain’t even peep her birthday was couple weeks after all of that. When I finally looked at the calendar and saw the date, that shit hit me in my chest like somebody dropped a brick on it.
I ain’t call Melissa, or popped up on her ass.
I just… shut down.
Came to the club, handled business, went home, laid in the dark, and that shit continued on repeat.
I knew she peeped the difference ‘cause she texted one night.
You good?And I stared at it for damn near an hour before I typed back,
Yeah. Just busy.I lied, because I ain’t have the words for the truth yet.
I was in my office at 4 Play, blinds half-closed, cameras up on the screen but I wasn’t really seein’ shit.
