Kit’s wrong.I’m not fearless.
I’m afraid.
I’m especially afraid of losing Kit because I will.He’s captivated by someone who doesn’t exist.I would rather he always remember that version of me, and not know who I really am.
My head spins as I open the door.But I focus on not bumping into anything as I grab my box of belongings off the table and make a beeline for the front door.
“Dandy, I’ll call you back,” Kit says quickly, hanging up and standing abruptly.“Where are you going?”
“This was a mistake.”
“Olivia—” Kit presses.
Hearing him use my “name” just confirms my decision.
But Kit launches in front of the door, blocking my exit.“A mistake?Why?Talk to me.”
“I appreciate your kindness?—”
“Oh, cut the bullshit!”he snaps, his stance firm.“What just happened?”
I can’t look at him.
I’m afraid he will see me for the liar and the bad person I really am.
“If I overstepped, I’m sorry.”
“You didn’t overstep.”I’m the one who can’t have a normal conversation, just as Jupiter said.
She was right.
I was kidding myself into thinking this could go any other way.
“Then why are you leaving?Please, just tell me what’s going on.”
I instead remain silent, shattering his perception of me being brave.
“Olivia—”
“Just stop,” I whisper, shaking my head as I can’t bear hearing him use that name.
“I can’t let you leave because I’m afraid I won’t ever see you again.”
“It’s probably for the best.”
“Stop using these clichés.You’re better than that!”
But I’m not.
“I’m doing this to protect you.”
“Protect me from what?”he exclaims, gripping my chin and begging I meet his eyes.His anguish is clear.“Tell me!”
“I can’t!”I finally crack.“You think I’m brave, but I’m not.I’m this way because I’m forced to be.”
“That makes no fucking sense.Who’s forcing you?”
“Me!”I scream, shrugging from his grip.“I’m the one who chooses to be this way, and just because some hot guy comes along and shows interest does not mean I’m about to change something that’s taken me years to build!”
