The gentleness. The laughter. The way he looked at me like I hung the moons.
All of it lies. All of it manipulation.
My stomach heaves. I barely turn aside before I'm retching into the grass, my body purging the festival food along with every foolish hope I'd let myself nurture.
I hear footsteps behind me. Heavy boots on stone.
"Serah."
Rakk's voice. Of course. Because he can't even grant me the dignity of falling apart alone.
"Go away." I don't turn around. Don't look at him. If I see his face right now, I'll do something violent.
"Please, just let me explain?—"
"Explain what?" I whirl on him, fury overriding every self-preservation instinct. "That you've been lying to me for weeks? That every tender moment was just you securing your breeding investment? Or maybe you want to explain how you decided toannounce to hundreds of warriors that you're actively fucking me without bothering to ask if I was okay with that first?"
He flinches like I struck him. Good.
"It wasn't like that. Serah, you have to understand?—"
"I understand perfectly." My voice cracks despite my best efforts. "I understand that I was stupid enough to think I was special. That what we had meant something beyond convenience. But you just made it abundantly clear what I actually am to you."
"That's not true." He steps closer, hands raised like he's approaching a spooked animal. "You are special. You mean everything to me. I was trying to protect you?—"
"By humiliating me?" The laugh that escapes sounds broken. "By reducing me to a breeding claim in front of your entire clan? By taking away the last shred of autonomy I had left?"
"You don't understand the danger?—"
"Then you should have explained it!" The words rip out of me. "You should have talked to me. Asked me. Given me any choice at all instead of just deciding my entire future without my consent!"
His jaw works. "There wasn't time. Gornak was touching you, the others were circling, and I heard what they were saying?—"
"What who was saying?"
"The warriors. About claiming you. About breeding rights." His voice drops to something raw and desperate. "They were talking about you like livestock up for auction, and I couldn't—I couldn't let that happen. So I made sure everyone knew you were mine."
Mine.
The possessive pronoun lands like a brand. I wrap my arms around myself, suddenly freezing despite the warm night air.
"I'm not yours," I whisper. "I'm not anyone's. That's the whole point you don't seem to grasp."
"Serah—"
"Did you ever actually care about me?" The question tears free before I can stop it. "Or was I just convenient? Available? A human who was already broken in, ready for breeding?"
His face goes stricken. "How can you even ask that? After everything we've shared?—"
"Everything we've shared was a lie." The words taste like ash. "You let me believe I had autonomy. That I was making choices. But the whole time, you were just—what? Waiting for the right moment to stake your claim? Making sure I was emotionally invested enough not to fight it?"
"That's not what happened." He reaches for me.
I jerk back so violently I nearly lose my footing on the riverbank. "Don't touch me."
His hand drops. The hurt in his eyes almost breaks through my anger. Almost makes me want to take it back, to let him explain, to believe whatever justification he offers.
But I can't separate him anymore. Can't divide the man who held me with such tenderness from the future Chieftain who just declared breeding rights over my body. They're the same person. They've always been the same person.
