The uneasy laugh this time has teeth. People begin talking in low voices, and I catch pieces as I move behind the counter.
“Poison Memories got too bold.”
“Ron always was crazy.”
“Not crazy. Ambitious.”
“Big difference when you’re the one underfoot?”
“They say Kauss promised he wouldn’t kill anyone.”
“Lot of room between alive and fine.”
That last one comes from Darlene.
I shoot her a look.
She shrugs. “There is.”
All morning, gossip rolls through the bakery thicker than steam. Someone heard Ron’s boys cleared out of Mercy after midnight. Someone saw three Memories limping near Rusk. Someone claims the abandoned Halo zoo has lights on again,which means the gang is using it as a hideout. Someone says Ron is angry because Kauss made him look weak. Someone else says Kauss is angry because Ron touched what belongs to him.
I nearly drop a coffee mug.
“Nothing belongs to Kauss,” I snap.
The whole counter goes quiet.
The man who said it, a courier with rain dripping from his chin, lifts both hands. “Didn’t mean anything by it.”
“Yes, you did.”
“Evie,” Darlene says, low.
No. Not low. Not calm. Not today.
I turn fully toward the courier. “I am not territory. I am not bait. I am not a prize in whatever stupid masculine death pageant Halo thinks this is becoming. Kauss helped me because he is decent under all that scowling, not because I am his property.”
The courier swallows. “Right. Sorry.”
Mr. Eddison nods from his booth. “She’s right.”
“Thank you.”
He adds, “Though that alien does look at you like a man who’s misplaced his religion and found it making pastries.”
“Mr. Eddison.”
“What? I’m old too. We get to say things.”
Darlene points at him with the coffee pot. “Careful. Age privilege has limits.”
The room laughs again, and this time it lasts longer. I pretend to be annoyed because pretending is easier than admitting my heart has just performed several unlicensed maneuvers inside my chest.
Kauss looks at you like that.
I do not know if it is true. I know only how I feel when he enters a room. I know the way my body listens before my mind admits I am waiting. I know he makes me feel safe and unsettledat the same time, which is unfair because those sensations should not share space. I know that when Ron threatened the bakery, part of me was afraid for myself, part for my customers, and part for what Kauss would become when he found out.
That last part scares me most.
