A knot formed in my stomach, and each whisper twisted it tighter.
The pieces all fit. Oleander was an elf from Emberleigh. He had the most striking eyes I’d ever seen, eyes that would follow me in my dreams for the rest of my life. He was the most handsome man I’d ever seen. His beauty was breathtaking. I’d not been able to look at anyone except him since he’d come into my stall that first day. He’d haunted me for the better part of a year when we were children. I’d learned the names and stories of the stars after one kiss from him, simply because I wanted to impress him in my boyhood. His memory had lingered even past that.
He was a dream come true, but I was not his dream.
Raylen was.
That knot ached and spread upward to my chest.
I assisted another customer, and I tried not to think of the rumors and whispers, of the inevitable conclusion they all drew. When my stall was empty again, I opened my leather-bound book and began to draft ideas for inventions. I did not do well with matters of the heart. I was a cerebral person, someone who thrived in matters of the mind and of the hands.
My sketches amounted to nothing.
“I’ve got something for you,” Acantha declared as they bound up to the table, slamming a plate in front of me followed by a folded piece of paper. “Is something wrong?”
I looked up at them, and I saw concern behind their eyes. “He never came.”
“Read that.” Acantha tapped their fingers against the paper.
My hands shook as I took it. I already knew the contents. He was telling me of his engagement, that the moment he stopped looking, he found what he was yearning for. He would thank me for my help, and he’d tell me that the night before had been wonderful, but it could only be one night. I drew in a deep breath and attempted to steel my heart against the oncoming pain.
The pain did not come.
The note was not telling me of an engagement. He’d not run off with a famous elf. He’d been summoned to help his mother at her stall. He apologized for not being able to see me that morning. At the very bottom was a hastily scribbled note, scrawled in a different color, promising to meet me after closing.
“You saw him?”
“I did,” Acantha answered. “He was adamant that I give this to you. He did not like the idea that you were waiting for him. He swore that he wrote this first thing in the morning, and he’d been struggling to find a courier.”
“He’s not engaged.”
My sibling furrowed their brow in confusion. “Why would he be engaged? I saw him leaving your cabin this morning with a very dreamy look on his face. I do not think he would have gone from that to accepting another elf’s proposal of marriage so quickly.”
“I heard a rumor…”
“Castien, you should know better than to listen to rumors.” I felt properly scolded by my sibling’s words and shifted behind the counter. “That man is smitten. When he speaks of you, his entire face lights up. You can see his heart in his eyes, and it belongs to you.”
The idea that Oleander’s heart belonged to me untangled the knot in my stomach. I felt better and freer than I had since I woke that morning with Oleander beside me.
I now just had to decide what I would do with this information.
I spent hours contemplating. Pages of my journal were filled with notes and lists, pros and cons of pursuing something more with Oleander. Someone from my shop traveled to Emberleigh at least once a month. I could take the journey and leave Acantha in charge of my shop. I could trust them for the days I was gone. They were already my second-in-command. I knew that Oleander wanted marriage, and I could compromise on that if it meant that I would have him and his heart.
As the hours passed, I asked myself important questions. Not just logistics, but questions about what I wanted from my life. My mind raced across topics, but it all circled back to one truth.
I did not ever want to feel the way I did during the hours where I thought Oleander was engaged to someone else.
The sun set, and the vendors closed. The market crowd thinned, and Acantha kissed my cheek and wished me luck before departing down the path back to the village. I paced the packed dirt floor of the stall, and when that did not work, I stepped outside and paced the area in front.
I spotted Oleander the moment he came into view. There was a slump to his shoulders until his eyes landed on me, and then his entire demeanor changed. His pace quickened, and I found myself pulled to him like a magnet to metal. We crashed into one another halfway down the lane. His arms wrapped around me, and he kissed me with so much passion that I felt ridiculous forever thinking that he would say yes to another elf’s proposal, no matter how famous he was.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered as he pulled away from me. “Father was ill, and Mother needed my help to run the apothecary. I tried. I tried to let you know as soon as I could, but it was busy and I didn’t know anyone to send you my note. Not until Acan—”
I cut him off with another kiss. His words fell silent as his tongue busied itself with mine. When I pulled away, his eyes sparkled with starlight. “They told me.”
“I’m still sorry.”
“You have no need to be sorry,” I assured him. “Your parents needed you. It is admirable that you would sacrifice your happiness for your parents. I know how you loathe working their apothecary.” I knew how they made him feel when he worked there. He doubted his ability when he was in their company. It was nothing more than an act of love, and how could I begrudge anyone an act of love for their family?
