“So ready.” Hers isn’t much better than mine. She opens her arms and I set him down. I want to remember this moment for the rest of my life as clearly as I am seeing it right now. Both loves of my life, safe and sound.
“He sure is something, isn’t he?” I say, sitting on the edge of the bed, bringing my arm up to rest on the baby.
“Yeah.” She softly runs her finger over his features. “I didn’t think I could love this much. My heart hurts from happiness.” She stares at him longingly. “I’m so sad I missed his first moments. This wasn’t how this was supposed to go.” A small tear tracks down her face.
My heart breaks for her. It was scary for me, but I can only imagine how it felt to be in her shoes. She’s the strongest woman I know. Handling everything life throws at her with such grace.
I kiss the top of her head. “I wish I could change it for you. You did good, mama. You stayed strong for our boy and got him here. We’ll make up for that lost time.” I grab her chin and make her look at me. “I don’t think I will ever repay you for this gift.”
That makes a smile crack across her face. “I’ll start making a list of demands.” There’s my feisty girl. The love of my life and mother of my child. “I sure love you.”
“I love you, too.”
“You need your picture with him and then we need to finalize the name,” I say, pulling my phone out of my pocket.
I get them both in the frame and it’s then I realize my heart is now living out of my chest. Half in each of them.
Chapter 38
Aspen
Ismile down at Jackson and I can hardly believe that this is my life right now. His tiny little hand wraps around my finger and every doubt I had in life evaporates. I was never really sure where I belonged. Whether I wasn’t enough or too much. But there’s one thing for sure: I was born to be this little guy’s mom. He looks like Rhett already. His little eyebrows are so dark. I run my free hand over them and the little scrunch between his eyes.
“How are you feeling, honey?” Rhett leans down and plants a kiss to my forehead.
I don’t think I could’ve done this without him. It was the scariest event in my life, and he was a rock throughout it all. He was made for this life, to be a dad to be mine.
“Well, my body feels like it’s been hit by a bus. My nipples feel like they might fall off. But at least my baby turned out cute.”
Rhett looks at the face of our sweet boy. A smile instantly stretches across his face, and the joy there is worth all the pain.
“We do make some pretty cute babies. And, Weston and I talked more, so that’s another win. If you’re not ready for visitors, it’s okay to say no, but your family is all here and ready when you are.”
“I’m ready. If everyone is out there, maybe have them come in waves. But I want to see my parents first.”
I’ve been a mom for just minutes, but I can only imagine how scary this whole ordeal has been for her now that I fully understand a mother’s love. Plus, I am lowkey traumatized for life from that birth experience, and really could use a hug from her.
He nods, kissing my head one more time before leaving the room to get them.
“Okay buddy, you’re getting ready to meet some of my favorite people. They will probably all be spoiling you rotten.” My finger rubs his chunky little cheek. I swear every time I look at him, my heart grows three sizes.
My mom walks through the door and we lock eyes. Every tough exterior I had is eviscerated. Tears start streaming down my cheek.
“How's my baby girl?” She walks to me, cradling my face between her hands, kissing me gently on the forehead.
“Tired. Sore. But I'm really happy to see you. I’m sorry it was a hectic twenty-four hours.” I motion to the room.
“There’s nothing to be sorry for. The important thing is you’re both okay. And the parts of you that aren’t will get there someday.” Her arms wrap around me, soothing the frayed edges of my emotion.
“Can your old man scoot in or is this a girls-only hug?” my dad asks, his hands in his pockets, rocking back on his heels.
“Get in here, old man,” I say, waving him closer.
Their arms encircle me as I hold my new baby boy. I only hope I can be half as good a parent as they are.
“So, do you guys have a name?” my mom asks as she looks down to Jackson with so much love.
Rhett walks up to the head of the bed, brushing the baby's cheek a little before looking up to me, letting me take the lead, but he’s still right there.
