“And how do you feel about that?”
I gave her a look. “You know I’ve been nursing a crush since last winter.” I let out a deep sigh. “He wassoperfect that whole week. The meals out, the meals he cooked for me, the card games, the movies, the Christmas tree farm—it was like a dream. And kissing him? Oh my God—like, movie chemistry. Never felt anything like it.”
“So... that’s a yes? You want to date Cade?” Her eyes glittered with enthusiasm.
I put my hand over my mouth to smother the smile breaking out and mumbled, “Yeah. I think I want to date Cade.”
Whit leaned her head back on the couch and looked at me sideways. “I love this for you, babe.”
“What about you, huh? Ivy’s one now—you ready to get back on the horse?”
She shook her head emphatically. “Yeah,no. This ride”—she gestured up and down her body—“is closed for business.”
“Okay, for now, but not forever?—”
“For the imaginable forever, yes. Stop deflecting. We’re talking aboutyoufinally getting some again. Me? I’m going to let my bits get all dusty and dried up.”
“That’s an image.” I threw a pillow at her.
My phone began to buzz.
“That the man in question?”
“Nope. My mom.” I clicked accept. “Hey, Mom. Yeah, it’s a good time.” I stuck my tongue out at Whit, effectively cutting short our Cade conversation. “How’s your wrist?”
I leftthe duplex later that day for my monthly session with Cheryl.
“How are things going lately, Brooke?” Cheryl asked as I settled onto the couch.
“Overall, I’d say they’re going really well. Work is good now that I switched units. I never have to see Brock anymore, which helps. The time with the babies helps as well. I feel like I’m healing, putting everything behind me.”
“I’m glad to hear it. Just remember—physical healing and emotional healing aren’t the same, and they both happen on their own timelines. It’s normal that one takes longer than the other. What about your issues communicating?”
“I’ve been talking to my mom more. I think things are going well. I might go visit her at some point. We don’t have any definite plans, though.”
“What else is going on in your life? Anything you’re looking forward to?”
“Well,” I started sheepishly, unsure of how she’d respond, “Cade is moving back to Vermont for the summer. And... he wants to take me out.”
“That’s good, right?”
“I think so.”
“What are your concerns?” She looked at me inquisitively.
“I guess just whether I’m ready, and whether I’ll be able to open up with him fully. I know I can be myself around him, but...”
“Does he know about your recent history? The end of your engagement and everything that followed?”
“He knows—that Brock and I broke up. He doesn’t know all the details.”
“Don’t you think he’d be supportive? He was your friend long before, and you’ve indicated he’s been a compassionate and understanding source of comfort in your life. It sounds like it’ll be up to you to cross that chasm and help him understand and accept you as you are now.”
I nodded, chewing my lip.
“I want a fresh start. I want to make him happy.”
“Just as long as you take care of yourself along the way, too. Don’t forget that part. You don’t have to be perfect or put on a show to be loved and valued. Your pain and loss are part of your journey. Anyone with you needs to understand that.”
