ELLIE: That’s okay. I’ll take Tommy out later. Make it really special.
Three dots appeared.
“Ellie?” Winona said. “What do you think?”
“I’m sorry.” I shoved the phone back in my pocket before I could read it. I ignored the next buzz. I remained present with the members of the board, because they were real and right before me. They weren’t some fantasy that had every likelihood of blowing up in my face.
Outside, after getting a squeeze from Sarah before she peeled away in her car, I strode down the street with Kit, who’d parked at Conrad’s place and walked with me.
The moment we were alone, Kit turned to me, her expression serious. “Ellie, are you doing okay?”
“Of course.”
“You seemed completely distracted at the meeting. Normally you’re the one making half the motions.”
“I’m just busy.” That wasn’t a lie. But it wasn’t the main thing occupying my brain and like a bloodhound, Kit had sniffed it out.
“That’s all?”
“There’s a lot going on,” I said, sidestepping. “I’m just so ready for the school and daycare to open. Won’t it be amazing being able to work so close to home, in a cushy classroom instead of on a work site?”
“Yeah, but I’m not going to be leaving my business when I teach. I think I’d die if I didn’t get to work outside with my hands in the dirt.”
My stomach pinched. I was only thinking about myself. “Sorry. Stuck in my own head again.”
“It’s fine,Ellie.”
But Kit had landed on another thing I was struggling with. My eagerness to no longer be practicing my trade. At least not full-time the way I was now. I felt like a fraud. I’d still get to talk about electrical and do demos in the classroom. I was just ready for life to be a little easier.
Kit let a beat pass, then said, “I saw Sam with your kids the other day.”
My stomach jolted at his name. “Oh yeah?”
“Yeah. On the river walkway. They looked so cute together.”
That was on Monday. Sam had offered to pick up Tommy that day too. Then he surprised me by getting us dinner. He’d somehow persuaded Tommy to go with them.
“He’s really gotten good with Henry,” I said.
“Good? They looked like best friends, Ellie. If you can be best friends with a baby. Also, Tommy wassmiling.”
I stopped walking. “Seriously?”
“Yeah. He has a sweet smile. I would have said Hi to them, just to get in on what they were laughing about, but I was driving by in my truck.”
That was the only day I’d actually laid eyes on Sam in the two weeks since his parents’ place. They’d come home while I was in the shower, and when I’d come out toweling my hair, he looked at me only briefly before heading out.
“Okay Ellie. Seriously. What is happening? You look like you’re going to cry.”
I stopped on the sidewalk, mad I was so obvious. I pressed my thumb into my palm, the pain feeling like a punishment I needed. Then I dropped my hands to my sides, giving up fighting it.
“If you must know,” I said, “I…we… Sam and I kind of made out.”
Kit screamed. Then she grabbed me by the arm and pulled me over to an alcove next to an empty shop, out of the way ofogling pedestrians. “I knew it. Ifucking knew it.Tell me everything.”
“What do you mean, youknewit?”
“Ellie. That man isin.He’s parenting both your boys. He looked happy as a pig in shit to be doing it, too.”
