But before he gets sucked into their orbit, he clears his throat, pulling away.
Holding ground.
Preserving memory.
Maintaining perimeter.
“What happened? Did Lara send you back?” he asks, imbuing his voice with indifference.
He doesn’t miss the way Seren flinches. The way her eyes widen just slightly at the cool timber of his voice.
Fuck.
He moves to the dresser, pouring two fingers of amber liquor—one for each of them.
Easier to hold a drink than her gaze.
Seren moves toward him, reaching for the glass, and he can sense the way her pulse quickens. In hurt, in anger, in desire, he doesn’t know.
She wraps her hand around the glass, brushing her fingers against his. Such a small touch. Enough to make him want things he has no right wanting.
She pins him in place with her stare, unwavering, unafraid. She’s not asking for permission anymore, she’s declaring.
He sucks in a sharp breath at the touch, but he pulls his hand away, dragging it through his sandy-blond hair in anguish. Torment.
Seren huffs a humorless laugh. “You know what your problem is, Teddy? You treat grief like a post to guard instead of something you survive.”
She takes a sip of her drink, hissing as it burns down her throat. “Life keeps moving even when you don’t, Teddy. You are allowed to move with it.”
He tips his head back, closing his eyes, caught between the past and the future. “I know,” he admits, but the words sound strained and brittle. Like he doesn’t believe them as they slip past his lips.
Seren lets out a huff of laughter, edged with bitterness. “And you’ve already kissed me, remember?”
Of course he fucking remembers.
He remembers it every time she walks into a room. Every time he closes his eyes.
Her soft lips.
Her hair threaded between the grip of his fingers.
The soft moan she let out when he kissed her neck.
He remembers how close he came to dragging her into his lap and forgetting every oath he’s ever sworn.
He remembers everything. She lives beneath his skin now, threaded through him like a vow he can neither keep nor break.
But those moments were the actions of a weak man. A man who breaks vows. Who forgets where he pledges his allegiance.
When he doesn’t speak, Seren’s face twists into something unbearable.Hurt.
“Do you regret it?” she whispers.
Despite himself, Teddy doesn’t hesitate. “Not for a single fucking heartbeat.”
He doesn’t.
Regret would be easier. Cleaner. Instead, he wants to do it again. And he hates himself for it.
