Alejandra wiped them quickly, almost embarrassed.
“I don’t cry in front of people,” she murmured.
“You don’t have to be anyone here,” Carla said gently. “You just have to be honest. For yourself.”
Alejandra nodded, wiping her nose on the sleeve of her white blouse without caring much about it anymore.
“Besides Callum, how’s your relationship with your family?” Carla asked.
“Fantastic. I love them so much,” Alejandra sniffed, her fingers tightening around the mug again. “I’m just scared to say these things to them.”
She looked down.
“They’ve built their lives around me.” The words came out heavier than she expected. “Maybe that’s why I came here instead of just doing an online meeting. If they don’t see me like this… they’ll never know how bad it really is.” She hesitated, then added, her voice smaller now: “I didn’t tell them how scared I am to go back into the ocean. My brother is my trainer. My coach. He—”
Her voice faltered completely.
“I… what am I supposed to do?”
“Nothing,” Carla replied gently.
Alejandra blinked, confused.
“Do you know when you’re on an airplane and the flight attendants give safety instructions about the oxygen masks?”
Alejandra frowned slightly. She had taken enough flights in her life to know the entire procedure. “Yes…”
“What do they always tell you?”
“To put your mask on first.”
“Exactly. And if someone next to you needs help, who do you assist first?”
“Myself,” she whispered.
“In this case, it’s the same, Alejandra. You take care of yourself first. Then you can worry about your brother and the rest of your family.”
Alejandra let that sink in. Slowly.
“I’m sure they’ll understand eventually,” Carla continued. “But if staying in London and giving yourself space to heal helps, there’s no reason to feel guilty.”
Alejandra nodded, taking a deep breath that trembled slightly at the end.
“Me first.”
“Exactly.”
Carla offered a small smile. “Let’s focus on getting you back in the ocean, on facing it, on reconnecting with it. You loved it once. It was your partner. It’s not your enemy.”
“But there’s no ocean here in London,” Alejandra pointed out.
Carla tilted her head. “Is that why you came?”
Alejandra pressed her lips together.
“I… don’t think so.”
She hesitated, then let the truth come out, piece by piece.
