He embraced her tightly, though it was hard with her hugely pregnant belly. He was grateful as ever that she’d come into his brother’s life and made it so much better. “It’s good to see you, too, Serenity. It seems as though it’s been a while.”
As he stepped back, he was immediately pulled into another warm hug by Vanessa, the statuesque brunette Adrian loved more than life. “Hello, Vanessa.”
She beamed up at him, mischief in her dark eyes. “We’ve been dying to know why you asked to meet with us. Not that we aren’t both thrilled to see you, but I believe this is the first time you’ve ever wanted to see us when your brothers weren’t around.”
He winced a bit, knowing it was true. He loved these women like they truly were his sisters, but he was also a bit jealous of the passionate love affairs that his brothers had managed to find with them. He always felt a bit left out, an outsider looking in. Actually, he supposed that was part of the reason why he’d come.
He wanted what they had.
That realization stunned him, and he felt as though he might collapse with the weight of it.I want to marry Fiona. I want her to be my wife.
How had he not realized it before? Why had he allowed himself to think that some sort of friendship would ever be enough?
Something of what he was feeling must have been visible in his face, because Vanessa grabbed his arm and guided him toward the nearest chair. “What is it, Morgan? You’ve suddenly gone white as a ghost.”
He looked up to find both women staring down at him in concern. “It’s all right,” he managed. “I’m fine. I just need some advice.”
They exchanged a look, then sat down side by side on the sofa across from him, their eyes wide with speculation.
“Of course,” Serenity answered for both of them. “Just tell us what you need. We’d be happy to help you. Is it something to do with the children?”
He shook his head, though he realized that would make sense. He was a man trying to raise three children alone. They probably wondered why he hadn’t come to them for help sooner. They were a wonderful built-in support system that he’d never really utilized. “No, it’s not the children. Though perhaps you can help me with that sometime down the road.”
“Then it must be Fiona,” Vanessa announced slyly.
At his surprised look, she smiled and shrugged. “You should know that Adrian and I don’t keep secrets from each other.”
Of course. Still, it made him a bit uncomfortable to know that he could no longer count on his twin’s discretion. “Yes,” he admitted. “It’s Fiona.”
Serenity clapped her hands together with delight. “Oh, Morgan. You don’t know how happy this makes us. We love Fiona and would like nothing more than to see the two of you together.”
He sighed and raked his hand through his hair. “That’s just it. I don’t think she’s as eager at the prospect as the two of you are. In the beginning, there was such a spark, such a connection between us. I’d never felt anything like it before.”
He paused, still a bit stunned by the fact that he was baring his soul to them like this and wondering just exactly how much he should share. In the end, he decided that he’d come this far, he might as well tell them everything.
“And then we kissed.” He ducked his head, unable to meet their bright gazes. “I think she liked it. I know I did. But since then, she’s kept me at arm’s length. I tried to talk to her about it, I even thought we were getting somewhere, but then, she got upset because I tried to ask her who Prometheus is, and she became distant all over again. She’s said that she doesn’t think she’s worthy of me. Which is ridiculous. I just don’t know how to convince her that she is.”
“Maybe we should have the two of you over for a dinner party,” Vanessa suggested, releasing his hand and leaning back, a gleam in her eyes as she started to plan. “You’ll come as a couple. It will be just the six of us. She could see what it would be like to be part of the family.”
But Serenity looked troubled. “Is that what you want, Morgan? Do you want to marry her?”
Hearing the words out loud terrified him, but his earlier realization still felt right. “Yes, I think so. If she’d have me.” He shook his head. “I know it seems too soon. I know people won’t understand. But she makes me happy. In a way that Anne never did,” he admitted softly, dropping his gaze.
“We can’t help who we love,” Serenity said, her voice soft with understanding. “And we can’t make ourselves love someone if that spark isn’t there.”
He still couldn’t look at her. “It isn’t that I didn’t care for Anne. I cared for her a great deal. I wanted to make her happy, and sometimes I think I did. But I needed her to try harder to make me happy as well, and she didn’t. She didn’t understand my darkness, didn’t want to talk about anything deeper than the weather, gossip, and the children. She was a wonderful woman, but she just wasn’t right for me.”
He felt disloyal for even saying those words, but they’d been building up in him for so long. He’d done poorly in choosing Anne. He’d barely known her when they’d gotten married, although they’d been acquainted his whole life. But even though he and Fiona had only been spending time together for a few weeks, he felt a connection with her, had opened up to her in ways he’d never thought he could.
“Then you didn’t have a mistress?” Vanessa asked tentatively. “She told me that you had been going out at night a lot...”
Guilt overwhelmed him to know his sweet wife had died believing such a thing. “I never strayed. Not physically.”
Vanessa looked as though she wanted to ask more but was torn between her allegiance to him and her fond memories of Anne. They had become great friends before Anne’s death. Anne had treated Vanessa kindly when the rest of their world had looked down up her for being an actress.
Deciding his silence would only make him look worse, he realized he might as well tell the truth. “I was painting. Every night, I was in the attic, painting.”
Serenity’s eyes widened. “I didn’t know you were an artist, Morgan.”
