“Someone needs to. What if you were in real danger?”
“But I wasn’t.”
“But what if you were?”
That was a good question, and if I wasn’t so consumed with Harper, I might consider why I’d risked my life rather than embarrass my parents by making a fuss.
Another time.
I climbed into bed, and Harper pulled the covers over me. I settled myself on the pillow, every part of me wanting to reach for her, to pull her under the covers too, and hold her tight. To protect her from whatever pain was hanging over her like a shroud.
But she stood apart, arms crossed, looking as if she were on the edge.
“Hey,” I said. “Come here.”
Harper shook her head. “I can’t, Orion. It’s why I’m here. To tell you I can’t.”
And of all the danger my heart might’ve been in that night, that hurt the most.
“I suspected as much. At least sit. Tell me.”
Harper hesitated, then sat on the edge of the bed. She inhaled a deep, steadying breath. Fortifying herself. Mustering her strength and will…she had so much of both. But I hated that she constantly had to draw on them, again and again.
“What happened?”
“It’s my mother. God, it’s so fucking…” She bit off her words, eyes shining. “I can’t believe I have to do this again. I cannot fucking believe I have to do this again.” She looked down, then at me. “She started back up with the drinking.”
“Oh fuck. Oh shit, Harper, I’m so sorry.”
“Yeah, and with that and everything else I’m dealing with, I just don’t think you and I… I mean, I don’t know what you were trying to tell me in chemistry today—”
“I wastryingto say I want to go to the festival with you, but that rat bastard, Ford, beat me to it.”
“That’s not all you were saying,” Harper said quietly. “But also, you never asked me to the festival.”
“I wanted to do it in person instead of by phone or text. Because I’m a goddamn gentleman. But it all went sideways, and I’m not, to say the least, an expert at talking about feelings.” I mimed a little explosion with my hands. “So they build up and go boom.”
“Did you ever take Wolfe up on his offer to play it out?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Lazy?”
She sighed. “Maybe you should.”
“There are a lot of things I should be doing, but we’re talking about you.”
Harper glanced down again, shook her head. “I don’t know how bad it is with my mother, or how far it’s gotten. Not too bad yet, Ihope. I might be able to get her back into AA. But it’s all too much. I have so much on my plate right now. With school, the NoSci—”
“You’re not going to get any heat on that from me.”
Harper frowned. “Why not? I wouldn’t expect you to hold back on my account. In fact, I’d feel like shit if you did.”
If you only knew.
“I’m just saying, I’m not exactly acing my classes. Any entry I make for NoSci is going to be half arsed at best.”
