“Pull away. Retreat,” he said. “Stay with me. Stay…”
I shook my head. “Ugh, look at me. Look atyou.You show up in a suit, and I fold like a lawn chair.”
He grinned slightly. “That was the plan.”
“But I meant what I said the other night. I feel like my life is teetering on the edge too.”
“I know,” he said. “And I’m all kinds of fucked up, in case you hadn’t noticed. But that doesn’t mean I want to let you go.”
God, everything he said and did was sending me into the clouds, while my brain tried to keep me on solid ground where it was safe.
“Okay, but I need to say the thing that sounds like too much too soon, but I promised myself the next time I got involved with someone it would be something real. Not casual.” I looked him straight in the eye. “I don’t mean we have to put labels on things right away, or whatever. I just mean—”
“I know what you mean,” Orion said. “You mean you want to be taken out on a proper date.” He smiled. “I can do that.”
“But is this something you want? Something—”
“Serious?” Orion finished. He nodded and brushed a curl off my cheek. “I can do that too. I want to. And I love that you are saying all this. You tell it like it is. No bullshit. That’s one of the things I like about you best. You’re fierce. Strong.”
“I don’t feel that way.”
“But you are. And for a bloke who grew up in a silent household where no one talked about anything, this is going to be new for me, but let me give it a whirl. You’re the only person in this whole bloody school I want to talk to. Or look at. Or stand next to. There’s no oneelse.”
“So, it’s me by default?”
He gave me a flat look.
“Sorry. Coping mechanism.”
“Incorrigible,” he said. “No, it’s you by…what’s the opposite of default? Excess? Abundance?” His dark eyes were soft on mine but heated now. “I want an abundance of you, Harper Bennett.”
Now both of his arms were around my waist, pulling me closer, and both of my arms were around his neck. My hand went to the back of his head, where his hair was short, before the little springs of his curls began. I’d never touched him there before. His hands had never been at the small of my back. Everything was new, every part of him unexplored and the anticipation was building in me to a fever pitch. I wanted to be allowed to touch his cheek, his jaw, to put my mouth on his neck and kiss him softly there and inhale him.
“You know that feeling where you see your crush from across the room?” Orion asked. “A bittersweet ache. A hunger, almost, that hurts, because you want them so bad, but they’re not yours. Not yet.”
I nodded, my heart pounding.
“That hunger is tinged with excitement, too. Anticipation for the time when you have that person. When the longing is over.” His eyes seemed to darken somehow, his voice rough. “But the ache is so good, so fucking painful in the best way…you almost don’t want it to end.”
Dear God.
“Do you know that feeling?” he asked.
I nodded again. I feel it every time I see you.
But I couldn’t speak, could barely move, I was trappedinthat feeling, and it was just like he said. I was yearning for his kiss in the worst way, and I wanted to stay in the purgatory of almost having it too.
Orion moved away just enough to look at me, his mouth inches from mine. “I’ve had that feeling before, but not like this. Not like tonight. With you.”
A little sigh escaped me. A gasp. My legs turned to sand, and Igripped his arm under his suit, almost dizzy from want of him.
“You’re really good at this,” I breathed, craning my chin up. His breath ghosted over my lips, and I nearly moaned. “Orion…”
“Not yet,” he whispered. “Just a little more…”
His hand came up and cupped my jaw, his thumb sweeping across my cheek, and then he brushed my lower lip while his eyes searched mine. I was locked in his embrace, his gaze, his space, watching him watch me, but fully present in the moment. My thudding heart sent blood to every nerve ending that was sparking where we touched, waiting and wanting more.
Orion’s gaze dropped to my mouth, then back to my eyes, his arm around my waist cinched me in, his head tilted to the side at the same time I craned up for him and our lips met in a kiss. The most perfect kiss of my life.
